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The Calm After the Storm

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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Fri Jun 09, 2017 2:19 pm

‘’Well, to each their own.’’ Just like not everyone wanted the same thing, everyone had different measures of what were they willing to be satisfied with. Or the reasons behind their beliefs. In many cases, it came down to that. Who can really say which way would be more painful in the end? It would kind of depend on the people involved and how they saw it after all. He really didn’t want to argue over something like that.

The next part however….wasn’t that simple. He would stare flatly at whatever object was in front of him at the moment. ‘’….and this is why I wanted to stay silent on this whole topic. I figured that if I went and said something, it’d probably just come down to you doubting me.’’ He wasn’t sure whether he was more angry or upset right now, but he definitely wasn’t in the best of moods. ‘’You care….it kind of sounds like what you care about the most is not wanting to get kicked away yourself. For all that story about how you learned happiness because you weren’t given up on no matter how mean and rude you were to them…you seem pretty quick to do the opposite and doubt me just because I present some of my opinions that aren’t cute and fluffy. You talk about all this awesomeness and beliefs…yet, you’d just leave if I went and told you to fuck off now?’’ Well, he didn’t know what the other’s goal was, but if the guy actually admired what those people did for him and all despite the fact that they could have left him be when he acted mean towards them, then he was kind of doing a poor job of making the most of that if he wasn’t willing to really believe in someone else too. He would snort somewhat bitterly. ‘’Play….is that really how you think of what I say? Thanks for the confidence I guess…You know, you’re hardly being helpful in making me desire being too close to someone.’’ Sometimes he really didn’t know how was he meant to take the guy. One moment putting being open with others on the pedestal and all…and next kind of making one feel like keeping their mouth zipped up was the best option anyway.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Rika on Fri Jun 09, 2017 3:17 pm

Indeed to each their own in the end. The demon wouldn’t push the matter even if he didn’t quite understand how one could think that way. He wasn’t trying to judge or anything with the matter and he most certainly didn’t care they were opposite in that regards too. That would’ve been fine and dandy...if it hadn’t flowed into the next conversation and transformed it into something more complicated than desired.

To what he heard the demon was relatively quiet though the other probably could feel him wiggling about though it wasn’t to get closer to him as he rolled to the edge of the bed and then sat up, turning himself to face the living room and away from the direction the other was in. His hands would rest on the bed, palms down as his tail just rested curled to his left. The other wouldn’t be able to see his face, but the energy around the demon or the way his ears were flopped downward were clear signs he was anything, but happy at the moment. He was miserable and feeling sick plain and simple, but somehow through it all it he managed to keep himself from crying or becoming overly sick where he’d need to run to the bathroom for now. It took him a moment, but he did eventually find his voice and spoke as he looked up at the ceiling a bit.

“Silence...doesn’t solve everything and just because I asked a question about how you felt about this, doesn’t mean I auto doubt you or just plain give up, but it is hard you know? Not knowing or being responded to with brush offs or words that suggest you don’t give a fuck or would prefer me not to be here. It hurts and I am not sure if you noticed, but I am not as strong as those kids or the master of that mountain. You say, I care more about not getting kicked away myself, that I am quick to be the opposite of those that helped me when I needed it most. If all that is that is true….do you really think I would still be here dealing with this when I could find some other sap to constantly confirm or lie to me to keep me oblivious and happy to the fact that I am truly not wanted? Or trying my hardest to figure this out, huh? I think if I was what you described, I would’ve been gone a long time ago. Just given up on whatever shred of hope I had to make it work.” The demon would pause as he lowered his head and shook it as he took a breath and continued. “As for walking away, I might’ve if you had answered that way. After all, if you just saw me as a sex toy or whatever, then I don’t want to be part of that. I’ve been there already and I don’t plan to go back. As for playing it wasn’t aimed at your words. I never saw anything fake about it. That is why I asked you to be just honest about it.” And that was the truth. He didn’t want to stay in a relationship that was going to be forever one sided or had no chances of becoming something more. Why would he submit himself to misery like that for nothing? It just wasn’t fair to himself and would do nothing, but undo whatever healing had been done to him in the past. It would be a repeated cycle...and he did not want that.

Regardless the demon would sigh a bit as he leaned forward to rest his elbows on his legs this whole affair draining him and making him sicker by the second, but he pushed through despite the emotional beating here. He had too. Besides….

“...I can’t make you desire anything….you have to figure out if you want what is before you or not, but I do know this: I can’t work on improving on my own and if you stay quiet I never know what you are thinking, what want, nothing. I need feedback to know what I am doing wrong or right. It may seem like doubt or lack of confidence, but honestly it is not. I am just trying to make it work…” He would trail off after that not sure what else to say or do to make the other understand that while he didn’t stand strong on the ground, he tried in his own ways. Though if the other was going to keep translating his attempts into him not trusting him or whatever, the demon honestly didn’t know what to do anymore and being lost made him just feel even worse. Why the hell was things always like this?
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Fri Jun 09, 2017 4:20 pm

Well, he had been turned away from the other in the first place, so it wasn’t like he could see much of what they guy was doing one way or another. He would frown to himself. ‘’I could say the same thing then. If I should trust that it’s ok because you haven’t left just yet and stick around….then why do I get questioned myself? I mean, I’m obviously still here despite sounding like I don’t give a fuck and whatever else you say. If it’s so hard for you, you think I feel much different about being prodded in a doubtful manner myself? If you can bring it up in my face, then there’s no reason why I couldn’t do that too.’’ Perhaps he was way more blunt with his words than the other, yes, but at the core it was kind of the same thing. If the demon could question his motives and all because of how he sounded at times….well, then it stood to reason that he wasn’t going to just stay quiet and take all the assumptions and poking questions as if they weren’t unpleasant at all. ‘’…anyway, I don’t know why the hell the first guess you’d come up with is me seeing you as a sex toy, but for the sake of my sanity, I just won’t ask.’’ Considering what he said before and all…he honestly didn’t get where that one was even coming from? If anything, he probably sounded more disinterested in sexy times with others, rather than wanting them for that purpose. He wouldn’t have put so much emphasis on it seeming easier without someone else were he to be after having someone around him for that purpose. Those two just contradicted each other.

‘’And well….how is one both not fake but also not honest at the same time? You know…when I say I don’t know….I mean I. don’t. fucking. know. I’m not sure how honest am I supposed to be beyond that. You want me to feed you something concrete when I’m not even sure and then have it become a lie later on? Because that would just be a grade one disaster in my opinion. I’d rather not say anything than to vomit something up just to satisfy and then end up being seen as a liar when it doesn’t quite turn out to match my words in the future.’’ What else was he supposed to do? He was pretty sure it would only be that much worse if he went and spouted nonsense because the other needed a yes or a no to calm down, just to later have the answer mean nothing. They would just end up fighting over that…and he would have no proof he hadn’t really meant it were he to have said a clear answer like that in the past.

He seriously had the urge to bang his head against the bed just about now. ‘’That’s the thing though. I hate making early decisions. My thoughts on something are more often than not far from being final. If I just tell you what I’m thinking in the moment, you’ll likely misinterpret me horribly and we end nowhere better. And frankly, I don’t know what I want. If I was so sure of all that, I would have gone and searched for a perfect date long ago or something. You can keep asking me all you want, but if I do say something and you take my first statements as the full truth to the matter, then this is about to be a pretty shitty ride. I can tell you that much.’’ Seeing as his initial words and all tended to make it look pretty bad and ended up with the other getting on him about that. He was kind of tired of that. If he didn’t say anything, it was bad because he should apparently share. But when he conceded and said something it just ended in a blow either because he had to decide on something without even being sure of his answer yet…or he had to blurb out something incomplete. One way or another, it didn’t make him feel good. He couldn’t really match up to the demon’s expectations of feedback left and right…
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Rika on Fri Jun 09, 2017 5:00 pm

The demon would hear the other and take in what he said, his stomach churning in unpleasant ways. He was honestly feeling sick from it all, but he didn’t dare try to move for the moment. Instead, he simply sat where he was as his eyes closed a bit.

“I am not saying you can’t question me…and to be honest, I am going to poke and question because that is how I am. I ask questions and poke things to try to figure them out. If you translate them to doubt or throwing you under the bus then...I honestly don’t know what to say to you. I can’t apologize and say it won’t happen again because that is not so... I could hold my tongue, I guess though I don’t seeing that helping...or helping either one of us understand each other better...” The demon would sigh. Though he wondered if these blow outs were any better. Like he didn’t expect the other to take things and roll with it all the time, but more times than not they often did or said things that just stepped on toes in all the wrong fashions leading to this. He wondered if this was even healthy at all. Questionable indeed, but it was what it was. He’d just somehow deal with it.

As for that short comment the demon would shrug lightly feeling the pricks of pain from the tension in his body and not caring. He knew the answer to why that was, but for now he didn’t say much. That wasn’t really the other’s fualt...he knew already the guy wasn’t like that, and yet...his mind auto went that anyway….It only added onto the mix of feelings within a feeling that only worsened as the rest of what was said sunk in. It would take him a moment to let the naseaua past before speaking again.

“A person who is in it for just the pleasure doesn’t have to fake that. That part of their story is not a lie. It’s the rest that is the lie that is the problem.” The demon shifted uncomfortably on the edge of the bed. “...I….know deep down inside that you are innocent in this, but….for whatever reason, I place things from past on you. I already know it is bad...and we’ve had a similar conversation about trust and all….but I can’t shut them out. I don’t want to make you feel like I am just throwing things at you or not taking you into consideration. I don’t want to make it seem like everything that comes out of your mouth is the end all...I don’t want that and yet I don’t know how to not do that...because typically what I say or do comes off as me sealing the deal with whatever you say….even if that is not the case…It’s not….”

Rika sighed again as he shifted his weight to the left a bit to lean on his arm a bit as he tried to ease a slight pain in his side. He didn’t know what to say anymore that wouldn’t dig the grave deeper. Like he wasn’t lying. He was trying to explain, but something within was telling him that somehow this was making it worse. Maybe it was just better for him to shut up after all….
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Fri Jun 09, 2017 5:24 pm

He would just grumble at the end of it all. ‘’….I’m just tired of this. Whether I choose to see your questioning as doubt or not…it doesn’t change the fact that it brings a lot of pressure. I’m expected to answer…and I can’t particularly trust that the outcome of me doing that is going to be peaceful or pleasant. These conversations leave a bad taste. I don’t enjoy that.’’ In the end, it would all come to that anyway. Apologies….extra explanations just to know that things are likely to not change much despite said talk…anything like that….it did nothing but make everyone feel bad and less interested in talking.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Rika on Fri Jun 09, 2017 5:33 pm

"...." For the first time since these two had been together, the demon actually didn't say anything to that because in a way he understood where the guy was coming from. Perhaps he was too demanding and not realizing it. Maybe there was no way to talk this out. They were going to be who they were, so he supposed the only solution was to just accept that and just adapt to what was happening. Though he didn't want to start another: "well let's try this conversation" because well those always went beautifully. So this time around, he would just stay quiet as he simply thought on not how such a bad person he was, etc, etc, but rather how he could work on not creating pressure for the other..or even figuring out how to make this communication thing better. If there were two things he could agree with they were: 1) This wasn't good no matter which way it was looked at and 2) This couldn't be the only way they spent time together. Where was fun time in all this if it was nothing, but debate and depression? Besides he was tired too. Tired of the fighting and the mental beating he got every time. There had to be an enough line somewhere right?
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Fri Jun 09, 2017 5:43 pm

Silence time? Well, he could do with that for now. He could kind of use some rest anyway. There had been way too much happening within the last few situations they've gone through today. He wasn't even trying to think too much for the moment. He didn't think he was going to come up with something revolutionary after this. Besides, traces of unpleasant mood could affect decision-making, and that was probably the last thing they needed to make happen. Sure, he was fairly calm right now, but it was still a bit hmmm if nothing else.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Rika on Fri Jun 09, 2017 5:56 pm

Silence time indeed. The demon still didn’t say anything as he instead shifted a bit to lay back on the edge of the bed his arms spread out in a cross fashion as he looked up at the ceiling for a bit before closing his eyes and just trying to get some of this tension and sickness away. Recovery was a bitch, but even so he remained highly aware of the other. It is just right now he had nothing to say or no way to break the ice, put out the flames? Yeah...that.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Fri Jun 09, 2017 6:05 pm

So much quiet. Perhaps that was appropriate for the situation however. He wasn't feeling the need to forcefully break it, and the silence kind of felt better than the headache of having to come up with responses to all that complicated mumbo-jumbo. It wasn't even about breaking the ice for him. Had he really wanted to, he could have done that somehow. He was honestly enjoying the tumbleweed time for the moment, so it appeared a bit unnecessary to hurry in getting rid of it. He wouldn't move at all, sticking to his original position still. Maybe he was just going to doze off like that. It's not like he didn't mean it when he said he was tired. Both meanings of it could apply here.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Rika on Fri Jun 09, 2017 6:13 pm

The demon would stay still for a bit feeling the drain of it all wear down into this odd state of heaviness. Unlike before where his mind would race to find a way to say something or fix things, this time he forced himself to block that part out and just listen to the silence and try to relax again. Maybe time out was all they needed here....
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Fri Jun 09, 2017 6:20 pm

Zzzz. Well, he could appreciate the break for now. Assuming the other wasn't going to change his mind at the last moment and jolt him completely awake by suddenly asking something or such. Then again, wondering about that wasn't going to help...and technically nor change the situation. He had no idea what was going on, but if the other was going to let him fall asleep on this, then might as well take it, right?
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Rika on Fri Jun 09, 2017 7:14 pm

Indeed the demon wouldn't disturb the other as the only thing he did was just shift about to get more comfortable on the bed. He ended up resting on his side, his back to the other, but for the most part not doing much else as he also began to go into sleep land. He was much too tired at this stage to start anything or attempt talking. So nap it was then.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Fri Jun 09, 2017 7:34 pm

''....''
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Rika on Fri Jun 09, 2017 7:40 pm

The demon would curl a bit. His arms curled at the elbows as his arms bent towards his head as his legs bent a bit as he pulled them closer. His ear would twitch slightly and his tail would move to rest closer to him, but outside of that the demon wouldn't move much.

Meanwhile, perhaps had gotten too quiet for from where ever Andromeda had been the cat would stretch a bit as she stood up and walked into the room where the two males were. She would tilt her head upward trying to see and when she couldn't, she would go to the other side of the bed and hop up. Staying at the edge she would watch the pair quietly as she flicked her tail for balance debating what she wanted to do.

For a while there was stillness with the demon occasionally shifting in his spot as he slept. He come to a stop might close the edge of the bed without realizing it. Andromeda would quietly watch this before doing the responsible thing. She'd pad across the bad over to Sharaku where she would promptly rub against his back before settling next to him...
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Fri Jun 09, 2017 8:47 pm

Well, he kinda felt that, but being what it was it was too disturbing. Some cat fur wasn't as alarming as other means of touching. Well, had the rubbing lasted longer then it may have startled tickling him, though whether that would have woken up was a mystery anyway. Nevertheless, he would just shift his arms a little to get more comfortable for now. ''Mmm...''
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Rika on Fri Jun 09, 2017 9:11 pm

Getting quite comfortable, the cat would pur as she didn't seem to mind the fact that he had moved, so stretching out she would lean back against the taller man as she watched her owner who seemed to be sleeping peacefully for now despite his location on the bed.

Enjoying the warmth and the quiet the cat would begin to doze as well the trio remaining quite peaceful for some time; however, a bought of unpleasantness within dream land caused the demon to frown in his sleep and perhaps he was fighting something or trying to get away from whatever plagued him in his dream. It caused him to roll and well when there is just air the body tends to go downward and that is pretty much what happened here.

The demon did try to grasp onto the covers the moment he felt himself falling, but it was too late, so with a heavy thud and an stiffled "omph!" The demon would hit the floor right on his left leg, the pain waking him up a bit as he gritted his teeth quietly and flicked his tail. For the love of all that was good why? Why couldn't he and the bed get along at times?
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Fri Jun 09, 2017 9:19 pm

Mmmm, what? Well, the sudden sounds and all would sure do a better job at waking him up, although it wasn't enough to make him jump from his position or such. He would open his eyes a bit and give a few blinks, half-wondering the hell the other was doing there, but he honestly wasn't awake enough to care too much as long as he didn't hear someone dying over there. He didn't want to move. With a faint grumble, he would close his eyes again as he moved an arm to rest it across his face. Well, he wasn't fully asleep for the moment, but it didn't appear like he had much intention to move about.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Rika on Fri Jun 09, 2017 9:29 pm

Her pillow would move causing the cat to move her head to look up at him. But when he settled again, she would just readjust a bit before looking over to the edge of the bed where her master had fallen. Much like the other, she seemed to be unphased by this falling considering it was a common occurrence for the fox.

Meanwhile the pain would go away, but he didn't get up right away. He would take a moment before taking a peek over the bed only to find that the guy was still sleep and it looked like Andromeda was having better luck being close to the guy than him. That was depressing...although cute at the same time. Shaking his head a bit, he would just slump back down and curl up on the floor instead. it was probably safer that way anyway. He wouldn't have to worry about falling or rolling and smashing cat or human. Rolling over to his other side for now he would rest his head against his arm and just stare out at the living room for now.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Fri Jun 09, 2017 9:42 pm

Yeah, he was totally not getting up for that if nothing major seemed to be happening there. Maybe if it had happened earlier and he had been less into the sleep at that point, he might have, but right now it was like....well, no-one was shaking him awake and he wasn't hearing anything disturbing for a prolonged amount of time, thus giving him no reason to be jumping into action. He was pretty sure that the other could make a move to wake him if something was important enough to need him. They've been having their silence moments before this anyway, so he had even less reason to force himself to be up just because.

Regardless, yes, he didn't move a whole lot while sleeping, although he would probably at least roll over on his other side in time, depending on how long he was left to sleep. The majority of movements that could come from him weren't ones that would make him move around the bed significantly one way or another.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Rika on Sat Jun 10, 2017 8:22 am

It would indeed be curious how long the demon would let the human sleep. Despite being on the floor and all he didn't make noise or get up to shake the other awake. He had no reason to the disturb the other and honestly couldn't think of much to say to him outside of apologizing or something. A thing that was probably getting old at this point.

So with nothing to say for the moment, he would remain quietly staring into the living though after a few moments, he would begin to doze lightly waking up once to actually crawl back into the bed placing himself rather close to the other as he wrapped his tail over his leg so it wouldn't disturb the other. Andromeda not wanting to be smooshed just move out of the way and rested on the edge of the bed instead. She would watch the two males sleep back to back at this point, but otherwise did nothing else to disturb them.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Sat Jun 10, 2017 8:33 am

Well, the cat probably made a good decision there, since she would definitely have risked getting quite a bit squished had she stayed between them. While the demon moving about and coming close didn't wake him up, perhaps he was at least unconsciously aware that something was really nearby. Or maybe it was just coincidence, but one would never know, right? Seeing as he would eventually roll over onto his other side, shifting his arms to rest them around the other loosely. It would seem he was sort of sleep-hugging the guy, although not too tightly or anything.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Rika on Sat Jun 10, 2017 9:36 am

The demon would doze peacefully enough somehow not rolling about as much now that he was closer to something. Maybe it was due to the fact that he was aware of this in some fashion or maybe he had finally gotten comfortable. It was a mystery really, but he would stay more or less still his arms curled on the bed before him as he slept. When the other rolled over and sleep-hugged him the demon would shift a little bit to snuggle closer to the other as one hand moved to rest lightly on his arm, but outside of that and a light purr of contentment the demon didn't do anything else for the moment.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Sat Jun 10, 2017 9:48 am

''Hmm....'' The situation seemed peaceful enough for the time being, outside of the light sound which probably just had to do with whatever he was dreaming about. For now, no one appeared to be disrupting the moment, although who knew how long they were going to remain asleep. One of them would likely wake up eventually, possibly waking the other in the process too thanks to their current close positioning.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Rika on Sat Jun 10, 2017 10:36 am

Peaceful indeed. The demon was quite comfortable where he was seeing no need to move as he drifted into a peaceful sleep. He'd only move once in his sleep, just flipping over to his other side so that he was facing the other, but otherwise he would remain peaceful enough snuggled against the other.

It is unknown how much time past, but perhaps not much considering when the demon did wake up it was still light out. Blinking sleepily, his eyes would bring the other into focus. A small smile crossing his face as he watched the other. He was a pretty guy, but more than that was the peaceful look on his face. One the demon didn't want to disturb, but kind of needed to since he had to go to the restroom. Ah le bladder. Ruining everything.

Hmm. Let's see. How to get out of the hug without disturbing the other? Well, he probably needed to back up, so for now he'd attempt to do that without waking the other up.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

Post by Sharaku on Sat Jun 10, 2017 10:47 am

Yeeeah...no. The wiggling didn't seem to be waking him up just yet, but despite that, he didn't appear to really want to let the other go, instead trying to hold onto the guy tighter. Perhaps he was getting used to that and didn't want his pillow to poof? It was hard to say, since it wasn't like he was doing it when awake and on purpose. Nevertheless, that was a thing. The other would maybe have to wake him up after all. Either that or struggle harder to pull away, which would likely result in the same thing, or at the very least partially depending on how that went.
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Re: The Calm After the Storm

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