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Breaking the ice?

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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Mon Oct 23, 2017 8:35 pm

The demon would give the other a sheepish smile as his expression softened. "I don't plan to break anything," he would say and honestly meant it. He was doing his best to move forward in a not so chaotic fashion that he would end up wounding himself like that. He knew the possibility was there, but let's not go that route. He was kind tired of ruining things for the other. It would be nice if this one ended right for once.

In any case, the demon would try his baby steps pausing as the other proved he could skate more or less, but stopping? The demon winced as he took a slightly larger stride forward so he could coast a bit closer to the other, his momentum being stopped easily enough before he reached the other. Balancing, he would look over at the other. "Well I am can't really answer that mystery. Though are you okay?" he would ask looking the other up and down as he hugged the wall in a way that could make a guy jealous if the wall competition that is....and if that was the case? That would be very sad indeed.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Sharaku on Tue Oct 24, 2017 6:19 am

He would frown as he made a move to push himself off of the wall, sending himself sliding backwards a little bit. "I'm fine...just need to do timing better..." That, or perform a better sudden stop. Either or would work to fix the issue. Or maybe he just shouldn't go straight into the wall to avoid this kind of situation altogether.

With a sigh, he would pat down his jacket a bit to smooth it out before shifting to glide closer towards the other. "Let's try something else. Hold onto me and I'll help you keep your balance. Maybe this will make things quicker.", he would offer, holding his arms out for the other to grab if he chose to go along with this.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Tue Oct 24, 2017 5:27 pm

"Ah okay," the demon said glad that the other wasn't hurt as he gave a small nod to the situation as he watched the other glide backwards a bit. As the other began to pat himself down the demon was on the edge of attempting to move again, but when he got the offer instead he would look up at the other with a sheepish grin. "Am I moving too slow for ya?" he would tease not hurt by what was said as he reached out and took the offered arm moving himself closer to the other.

Once more or less secured, he would look up at the other with a small smile. "Okay. Let's go," he would say and then if the other moved with him, he would begin to try to skate again. At first he took it slow, but then as he became a bit more confident in his balance, he would take bolder steps wobbling a bit on some, but thankfully not falling or pulling the other down. It took a while, but in time the demon was able to skate next to the other without a problem. Though he did not release the other's arm as he stayed by the guy's side quite happy in the moment...until that gnawing thought came back. The one that sought an answer. Keeping his vision ahead for a moment, the demon would bite his lip slightly as he had an internal debate with himself for a few seconds before coming to some form of conclusion and looking up at the other.

"Hey um...so like this thing we're doing. I appreciate it, but I can't help feeling a bit conflicted about it. You see on one side, I want to believe this is what is. A date and your way of saying yes we are dating. That we are partners now, but...at the same time I am a bit scared to make that assumption considering what I've learned of you in the past in regards to touch and this matter. The two emotions has left me very confused, so if you don't mind... Can you clear this matter up for me? Is this just a nice one time deal or....is this something more?" The demon would say the words that were so hard to get out considering he was terrified of the consequences, but he had to ask lest he drive himself insane. He just hoped the other didn't take what he was saying badly.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Sharaku on Tue Oct 24, 2017 6:08 pm

"I just don't want to see you break your ass in half.", he would snort. Plus, it would be rude of him to move away and do his own thing while the other was in one spot and trying to learn. However, were he to stay around, he wouldn't get to do much skating for himself, lest he wanted more accidents with a wall due to a small area for movement.

Nevertheless, since the other agreed to the idea, he would do his best to keep the optimal pace and not let himself be unbalanced by the extra weight holding onto him until the demon was secure enough to not really be using him as support anymore. When the other dropped the questioning on him all of a sudden, he would stay silent for a bit, keeping his gaze locked ahead with a faint frown. "I wasn't...necessarily trying to make a statement by doing this. I don't really look at it the same way as you, I suppose. I was never trying to impose what you should consider our relationship to be, you know? I didn't say anything because I was hoping we could just have fun and not stress about everything for once. To be honest, I think the lines blur naturally. You can't say from what point exactly two people become an official couple. It's kind of fluid. Besides, would I be asking you on a date if there was nothing between us to begin with?" If the answer to this was a one time deal, what would really be the point of it? Asking someone out when you plan to never bother again seems like a rather jerkish move, actually.

"Though, if I have to give my input on this, I think I would actually prefer the term boyfriend for the time being. Calling us partners honestly sounds like we're already married and stuff."
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Tue Oct 24, 2017 8:40 pm

"But...it is already in half, so would it be in fourths then?" Okay. Yes he knew what the guy was referring to it and while he did appreciate the concern, he couldn't resist poking at the words. Well wherever that went it would go and in time be another thing that had passed by.

As the demon skated, he was happy the other was so patient with him and felt kind of bad for locking the guy down like that by taking his offer, but he tried not to feel too bad about it as he enjoyed the ice skating up until the point he asked his questions. At first the demon thought he had made an error, the silence suffocating and when the other answered?

The demon would considered the first set of words carefully as a small smile crossed his lips. "I think you forget....stressing out is what I do." He would give a weak chuckle before shaking his head as his expression became serious. "To be frank, I am not trying to stress you out with what I said. It's just my mind didn't know what to do with the situation. Or maybe it did and I just over thought it until it was a problem for me. I...have a bad habit of doing that. But enough that." The demon would push the negativity away as he took a breath and let out slowly calming that train wreck before it got out of hand. "In any case, I suppose you are right. I suppose there is something between us for you to be doing this." It was nice to think on and it did cause the demon to smile, though that smile would vanish as he looked up at the other in shock, the words he heard taking him completely off guard.

Boyfriend?

The demon didn't know what to say as he watched the other for a moment feeling a bit light head before he looked away his face a bit red and an odd smile on his face. he wasn't embarrassed or anything like that. He was just really happy and relieved. That simply confirmation released a bunch of pint of stress and worries within him and as that weight lifted, the demon didn't know how to act. So it would take him a movement to recover as he leaned slightly into the other. "Thank you." Was all he could get out as he took the time to just recover from this strange sense of freedom and joy.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Sharaku on Wed Oct 25, 2017 6:05 am

"The image of an ass looking like 4 meatbuns was probably not something I needed in my life....", he would comment with a somewhat blank expression before shaking his head to clear his mind. Nope. Delete that. Not a good idea. Albeit, he'd admit it was mildly funny, but 4x ass was just not a good idea realistically.

Moving on through learning phases to...unexpected questions and answers. "I didn't forget. Still, I think that thinking too hard about the state of things creates a weight that keeps the hang outs themselves from being genuinely enjoyable. I was hoping that not drawing attention to it would help." He wasn't necessarily stressed out by it right now. It was more of a general thing, and how it made matters more stifling by hanging around them like a heavy cloud.

In any case, he would blink with a somewhat confused expression when the other started acting odd after his next words. ??? "What..for?" He kind of wasn't sure he was getting this...
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Wed Oct 25, 2017 6:28 pm

"Your welcome." The demon would give the other a nod and a sheepish grin. It was an odd imagine, but hey entertaining was entertaining. As long as it didn't occur for real that would be okay, yes? Though if it did happen...how did that even work. And why was he even pondering that. Oookay. Nope. The demon would push that thought away and focus back on skating

...and the can worms he opened a bit. Well at least this wasn't causing a blow out and the demon was surprisingly calm as he listened and nodded. "I does create a heavy weight. I can confirm that easily enough and while I was trying really hard not to bring it up. It just kept bothering me until I just couldn't stay quiet anymore." The demon would say as he looked ahead with a small frown on his face. Sometimes he wish he could turn off that part of the brain that caused rain clouds and just relax, but for him it would take more work. He just prayed he hadn't ruined everything with it...or with his next action once he was finally released from those worry chains.

When the other question him, the demon was quiet for a moment as he remained slightly leaned against him as he thought how to answer it. And then standing up straighter again, the demon would open his mouth.

"For going through all my shit, taking blows, and still in the end seeing me for me and not letting my flaws stop you for choosing me in the end." The demon would pause and roll his eyes a bit a small smirk crossed his face. "I know its sappy and maybe even silly, but I cannot express in words how happy and relieved that answer made me. I just felt a little light head is all, but I am okay." Well he was being as clear as he could in this situation. Would it work? He did not know, but he would certainly wait and see.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Sharaku on Thu Oct 26, 2017 4:43 pm

He would just shoot the guy a dirty look in return for that, mostly in jest, before leaving the matter be. It wasn't really the right time and place to think about asses and how they could be...uh, altered. Or something.

In any case, he would continue watching the path ahead as he considered the words said. "Are you afraid I'd leave you behind?", he'd ask after a moment of thinking about it. He was honestly having a hard time genuinely understanding why did their relationship status bother the other so much. Personally, he just didn't take it that seriously. Even when it was 'set in stone' so to speak, it didn't mean the couple in question wasn't going to break up a few months later due to some big blow out. There's just no guarantee of 'forever' in relationships, no matter how much one may strive for it. You can claim someone as your future husband one moment, and be breaking up with him several weeks later anyway.

"The sap will be my undoing one day.", he would shake his head slightly. "To be fair though, most of my suffering is my own fault, and doesn't have much to do with you specifically." He honestly had more issues dealing with himself in the end, though he was trying his best to work it all out.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Thu Oct 26, 2017 5:50 pm

The demon would see the look, but instead of flinching or becoming worried that he had made some error the demon would give the other a sheepish smirk as he continued to skate along side of the other. What one's imagination did with words was one's own business. Either way the demon wouldn't push that matter any further as things drifted from fun to something a bit more serious.

When the demon heard the question, his eyes would drift downward slightly as he contemplated that one not sure how or if he could answer that without bring the mood down or breaking this. Yet he had to say something didn't he? It took a moment, but eventually the demon would speak. "Yes. I suppose when I push away things and look at the worry for what it is, then that is certainly the fear. Abandonment...and just misery from it." The demon would say the words calmly enough his mind drifting elsewhere for a moment as he continued to skate. He was't trying to destroy anything or worry the guy with this, but he couldn't lie either. That would be no good so it was what it was. He just hope this didn't make things slide down hill. He would kill himself if that happened...again. He understood there was no such thing as forever or happily ever in an instance. He understood that there was a chance things would fall apart, but even so was it really too much to ask for? A little bit of happiness? He wasn't sure anymore.

In any case, he would let that go where it was as the next topic came up and he gave the other a lopsided smile when it came to the sap comment. "Well let's hope not cause I am full of it," the demon would say before becoming more serious as the he heard the other words. He would nod a bit before attempting to ask: "What makes you say that?"
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Sharaku on Thu Oct 26, 2017 6:27 pm

He would hum under his breath slightly at the answer before moving one arms to pat the other on the head. "You're never really alone though, you know?" Besides, even if they did end up not being together as a couple, it didn't mean he would just walk away and refuse to ever see the other again. He wasn't really that kind of a person, unless he was given a good, solid reason to avoid someone's presence.

"Looks like I need to buy me a sap shield.", he would huff slightly. Well, it wasn't like it really hurt him, but he generally did not know what to do in the face of such stuff. "The way my emotional response and attitude works, I suppose.", he would answer in a rather simplified way for now.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Thu Oct 26, 2017 7:06 pm

The demon was a bit lost in thought so when the other touched him, he jumped very faintly startled back to reality as he looked up at the other and heard the words. To what he heard, the demon would blink a bit. "You'd...actually still want to be around me if this whole romance thing didn't work out? Wouldn't a bad experience repel you away from the thing that was part of it?" It was one thing to stick by his side and teach him to love and heal again, but outside of that rare case. Most of the time when you fumbled badly people avoided you no? He was a bit confused for sure, but was curious enough to want to know the answer so he waited to see what would be done.

As for the next part, the demon would chuckle slightly as he used his free hand to rub the back of his head. "That bad huh?" the demon would tease a bit before becoming quiet and considering the next words. He was quiet for a few seconds before asking. "How do they work?" His tone remained gentle and open, but also highly aware of the other's attitude and behavior towards what he was saying.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Sharaku on Thu Oct 26, 2017 7:32 pm

He would raise an eyebrow at that. Well, they certainly had different thought processes when it came to this, that was for sure. "I don't hate you as a person. Romance isn't the world to me either. I don't really see the link. Unless, of course, it didn't work out due to some obviously hurtful things, like purposeful cheating or abuse. Otherwise, we could always just be friends." Romance not working out? Okay, well, just stop trying to make it romantic then? Maybe it didn't always work out perfectly, but he didn't see why it wasn't worth a try. There was a reason as to why you've been spending time with the person to begin with, no?

"It's better to have a repellent handy in case of a crisis." Yeah, something like that. Juuust in case he had no other solution but to try and defend himself from being drowned in all the sap. He would snort. "Well, it would probably be more accurate to say that sometimes they work and sometimes they don't."
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Thu Oct 26, 2017 8:24 pm

They could remain friends? The demon would consider that option for a moment. "I suppose, I would have to get used to that. It...takes me a while to get over things...so I can't imagine that transition being super easy and stress free if it came to that." Did he hate the guy? No. Would he hate the guy if they broke up? Not without reason, but still unlike the other, he wasn't too sure how he'd handle the pain of having to face the guy unless the break up was super gentle somehow. On one hand the concept was intriguing and the on the other a bit uncertain. He wasn't sure what to think on it to be honest and it left him perplexed about a question he could not answer right now. After all romance was different for the demon anyway.

That aside, the demon would raise an eyebrow at the other. "A crisis. like what?" What did the other expect him to do. Force the stuff on him all the time? That strange topic aside, the demon would tilt his head a bit. "Hmm. What do you mean?"
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Sharaku on Fri Oct 27, 2017 11:44 am

"Doesn't that depend on when though? We weren't really a proper couple to begin with yet. Would it really be that bad already?" Unless the other was thinking ahead of time already, and imagining a break up happening in the future. Which it could anyway, as time can change people and their opinions.

He would shrug lightly. "Who knows. That was mostly a joke anyway." He couldn't predict what would happen. So technically a crisis was possible, but what would it look like, he had no real idea. "That my mindset towards this is unpredictable. Tomorrow I could be stuck debating why was it that I thought doing romantic stuff was fun the previous day. I'm my own insanity, honestly.", he would shake his head with a snort.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Fri Oct 27, 2017 5:22 pm

The demon would look up at the other at the question as his eyebrows furrow in contemplation. "If you took it from right now...then I can only say maybe. I think I could recover a bit faster than if this had gone on longer and then suddenly we broke off for whatever reason. The pain is still there either way. I guess time and how it happens determines the intensity and the recovery time." If they had been going out a few days and then broke up due to some unknown thing, the demon would still hurt and take time to recover, but he would probably swallow being face-to-face with the guy again a tad easier versus than if it had the broke up happened longer in the relationship. Could he still just be friends in either case? Probably...It was just... unlike the other romance was a thing for the demon and when he invested so much of himself into someone and then had that unplugged, the end results always would take him time to recover from.

That aside the demon would chuckle as he shifted a bit so that he could hold the guy's hand versus just leaning on him. "I know it was," he would say amused for the time being; however, play would die down as he listened to the other describe his mindset towards romance. "Well," he would begin as he looked at ahead for the time being. "I think that is okay. Even if you may question it later as long as we enjoy the moment that you are feeling romantic, it should be alright shouldn't it?"

The demon would ask as gave the other's hand a small squeeze as he tried to give him a reassuring look as he looked up at the guy.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Sharaku on Fri Oct 27, 2017 6:18 pm

Well, there were plenty things he could try to say to that, but this time around he would opt to stay silent rather than blowing more into the fire and risking it getting our of hand somehow. They were obviously never going to be on the same page when it came to the matter anyway. Personally, he just wasn't able to fit the idea of such intense attachment into his mental framework. Yes, getting broken up with after a couple days would suck, but honestly, a short time crush shouldn't be that hard to get over. Maybe he just didn't understand, but to him it made little sense to need heavy recovery and stuff unless you were betrayed in a painful way, or if nothing else, were deeply in love with the person at the point when it happened. The two of them were not really at a stage that could be likened to a deep and committed romantic relationship in any way, were they...? It wasn't like he didn't see romance as a thing entirely, but to him it was always very muted and fickle even when it did rear its head in some way. In fact, he would probably suffer from the opposite issue...and kind of actually did. For him, it was hard to hold onto the feeling as opposed to letting it go.

"Hmph...", he would make a low sound, not protesting the hand holding for the time being. Though with the next subject, he would click his tongue slightly. "It isn't really fair though. You're busy worrying about how much it would hurt you if I dumped you, while I struggle to even be sure of what I feel." He couldn't really get a solid grasp on it, no matter what he did.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Fri Oct 27, 2017 7:04 pm

The demon would take note of the silence, but instead of trying to poke at it or be worried that something wrong had been said, he just accepted it. He had his way with feelings and the other had a different way than him. He could probably try to explain, but that might get into some areas they did not want to go and honestly...the demon was already feeling a bit bad that he had even said what he said out loud.
He wasn't trying to bring the mood down or make every conversation that they had super deep, but somehow it ended this way. He wondered if they would have just normal chat like they did online versus too many heavy or tricky topics all the time. It was a wandering curiosity, but one the demon didn't dig into too far as that subject rested on its own and others came up.

To the sound he heard, the demon would give a glance to see the other's facial expression. He didn't sense anger or anything there and the guy didn't resist his hand holding so that was good. As for that next subject...

The demon looked off to the side thinking for a bit before he responded back. "Fair? I would say we are evenly matched. I worry when I shouldn't and add stress to myself and you, but on the flip side you do the same with your struggle with emotions. I know these issues won't resolves themselves easily or may ever, but even so I think if we work through it and just go with the flaws we have we can find some sort of even ground of understanding and go from there." Well at least he was trying to be comforting and helpful.

He wasn't sure how to help the other with issue fully just as the other would not be able to help him with his own. It looked like they had some demons alright, but if they could stick together they'd be alright...right?
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Sharaku on Fri Oct 27, 2017 7:32 pm

"I...that's not necessarily what I was pointing at. I just meant the fact that you're so devoted and into it, while I obviously cannot match that no matter how I go about it. It's unfair, because we're far from equally engaged. Besides, since you already mention the issues, it all just goes in a constant circle anyway." And there seemed to be no stopping for that anytime soon, honestly. One thing triggered the other, and then the same happened vice-versa, thus making it happen over and over again in both directions.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Fri Oct 27, 2017 9:49 pm

"It does go in a circle. Over and over again. I don't know if that will stop. Nor do I know if we will be on even playing fields ever, but...that is okay. I am not asking you to match my engagement or make it fair. I just want you to be you and be comfortable with the fact that it is uneven. I am happy enough you are here." The demon would say and just pray he wasn't off topic here.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Sharaku on Sat Oct 28, 2017 9:50 am

He would shake his head a bit. "I don't know if I can. The circle is a somewhat dangerous one. My mind...is wired to be on guard most of the time. When I do manage to get into the moment, it tends to all shatter once something unpleasant is brought up. Which happens sooner or later due to your worrying. And then me pushing away in some form just causes you to worry more as a result. It's not the happiest kind of arrangement." It basically just went up and down constantly, and that could be tiring to keep up with.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Sat Oct 28, 2017 10:55 am

The demon would bite his lip at that one. He could try to put hope in the matter, try to make it better. Get things back on track. He could --
The demon would sigh slightly in the end before speaking. This time his tone was serious versus gentle. "I do have the tendency to do that. To poke and pry, when it probably best to leave it alone. I honestly wish I didn't and believe, I've tried multiple times to just push away, but it there. Just as much as your issues. I try to make things better by using things that would make feel better on you, but in the end you see right through that and so we come back to this cycle of up and down. It's tiring, but it is what is. I don't know what that means for our situation at hand..." He couldn't know really. Just like he couldn't promise not to do this again. It was frustrating in the end.
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Sharaku on Sat Oct 28, 2017 11:15 am

The other could have, yes. Would it have accomplished anything? Outside of keeping this conversation circling around the subject, probably not, in all honesty.

Blinking a few times as he listened to the words, he would actually proceed laugh for a moment, though he would stop when he almost choked himself on air. "You're forgetting one important difference between us, you know?", he would snort as he shifted slightly to grab the other's hand with his opposite one and attempt to pull the guy in front of himself, hugging him from behind. "I don't respond well to sugary emotional cues. I'm an analytical minded person. When something isn't right, promises of hope don't change it for me. I just want things to make logical sense, and have an understanding of what is happening...."
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Sat Oct 28, 2017 12:17 pm

The demon was expecting the worse after he said his words, so when the other started to laugh it was no surprise that the demon would look up at him completely confused. He didn't understand what was so funny and for a second didn't know how to react. The demon would watch the other with concerns for a few moments and then give a nervous smile..until the other almost choked. He would've tried to pat him on the back, but before he could the other had recover and was now acting.

The demon heard the first words, but didn't have a chance to respond as he found himself suddenly being pulled in front of the other. Focusing on staying on his feet, the demon would go along with the pull until he found himself wrapped in the other's arms as he was hugged from behind.

Being this close the other would be able to feel the tension in the demon's body from all the overthinking he had been doing, but almost a second later it was melting away as the demon took comfort in the other's embrace, his hand moving so they could rest easily along the other's arms as he matched his strides with the other's to keep the balance going.

"And I eat the emotional up and don't know how to respond to logic at times when I am already distressed," he began as he leaned easily into the hug with a chuckle. "Perhaps part of the problem is a language barrier of a sort. Like I can be analytical in some cases, but not everyone. Where you can and even detach yourself from the situation. Perhaps we need to work on learning each other's languages a bit better."
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Sharaku on Sat Oct 28, 2017 1:30 pm

Well, his way of dealing with things could be crooked at times, but in the end a bit of a laugh was better than things escalating into an argument, right?

Nevertheless, he would hum slightly, resting his chin on the top of the demon's head. "I just like to address things in a matter of fact way. I'm usually not looking to hear how it could potentially become better with hope when I know magic just isn't going to happen. You seem to like to try to coddle though. I guess that's a thing..."
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Re: Breaking the ice?

Post by Rika on Sat Oct 28, 2017 1:54 pm

Indeed it was better than argument even if it was a very odd way to react to things. Nevertheless the demon found himself appreciating it as they continued to skate close together. He would hear the hum and feel the other rest his chin on top of his head. He didn't mind it as he closed his eyes temporarily trusting the other to lead for the moment as he released a soft purr of contentment.

When it was his turn to speak, his eyes would reopen. "Mmm. I see and yes I do have the tendency to comfort in such ways. I know magic is not at play here and that I can't predict what will happen. Still I like to believe and hope it will be alright in the end, so I say what I say. Even if it may not seem the most logical. I feel that if I just address the matter head on and in a serious fashion I would just make the situation worse and depressing. And I don't want that. I am not wired to apply logic to emotional things I guess." Problematic? Maybe, but it is not like he couldn't learn new things to make things perhaps easier for them.
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