A Bottle Rum

“Oh, okay,” the blonde would have a dazed expression thanks to the alcohol in him, but at the same time he seemed to be paying attention as indicated by the frown of thought on his face as he took a moment to absorb what had been said. He suppose it was sometimes wiser to wait and let things settle as words did sometimes made others flare, but at the same time….”Well I can seeb the waitin’ for ta sstorm to passs part, buh what hapens if like they dun speak ub? Like wha if ta only wayb to get it outta tim is to ax?” Yes, it was true that he had come back to the issue when they had their blow out, but honestly the guy got lucky with that one. Sometimes things didn’t come out without some prodding and sometimes when left alone the unspoken or forgotten was worse than spoken. He’d let that one sit for a bit to see what end result would come out of it.

“Hehe. We don’t blame ya for tat,” Rika would chuckle to the other’s comment about drama queens and those that put on a show just get attention. While he could be a bit over the top and throw a tantrum, it was for a reason rather than attention that he did what he did. He honestly didn’t get the drama queen and even less than his understanding was his tolerance for them. He never had an issue turning his nose up or walking away from them so there was that. Even so, with the guy’s stance he had to wonder if he did get to that point where he was so upset he could be labeled drama queen, would Sharaku ‘show him to the door’ too? He didn’t want to test it, but still if the guy hung around enough that could happen. As his grin faded and he looked up at the other sleepy with a few blinks he debated about asking him about this, but then thinking maybe this wasn’t the time for that sort of talk, his smile would appear again as he rested his head against his arm once more and remained mostly quietly until his hair bothered him.

While he fussed with his hair, he didn’t seem to be bothered by being watched….but then again, he was never bothered by people staring at him. As long as they weren’t poking at him or doing anything that made him uncomfortable, he'd just let them stare. Hair issues and staring aside though, what came up next got a small huff from the blonde as he glanced over at the other moodily from his downed position. He wasn’t mad with him. He just a bit ruffled in general. Even so, he tried again to explain. “Ta long and ta short of mah gibgerish…..we dunno how ta approach obers cause like we’b been bad and weird for so long we wonber if folk won’t juss rum...er...run.” He tried to be clearer, but maybe that made it worse. He didn’t know as he rubbed his temples to ease the pressure in his head. As the pressure and stress of the situation passed, he would let his hands drop to the table as he looked over at the other with a calmer expression as he nodded. “Yeah….lotss o’ tinking, buhh...we tink,” he would sigh as he sat up and leaned back in his seat closing his eyes a bit as small signs of exhaustion from the emotional drain showed on him. ”We tink it’s time for ta change. Stop runnin’ so ta speak amb face it all, ya know?” He would reopen his eyes as he looked at the other from the corner of his eyes as a weak smile played across his lips. “We dunno like harb stuff, buh we gotta do it, so…” He would shrug lightly at the end. They could talk on the topic all they wanted, but in the end it would be nothing more than that - talk. He knew to get anything done he needed to step forward and he would...even if it was uncomfortable as hell to step out of the box to make a change in life. That topic aside though, things would move on to odd smiles and even odder words.

“Sobee we shall,” Rika would respond back with his usual lopsided grin as he swayed in his chair. Heh. So the guy didn’t trust him to remember his own words? Hehe. Well maybe he couldn’t blame him there. While he was pretty laid back for sure, he didn’t deny he was not a perfect being and so would probably botch up on interpreting things even more so when this one before him was so serious in his speech. Even so, he wasn’t lying when he said he would at least try. He could at least do that even if every round wasn’t guaranteed to be smooth.

Speaking of smooth. You see how smoothly the next bit of the conversation slid into mostly silence? Yeah. Rika didn’t have much to say back to the short answer given about pulling legs and what not. At this point it was moot point and to continue to argue it was kind of dumb and pointless. The blonde wasn’t interested in dancing in circles so he would just shake his head lightly at this, but otherwise keep quiet. Though he would raise his eyebrows at the mild glare. Eh? Did he strike a nerve with his words? Kind of seemed like it, but when the other didn’t make a big deal about the blonde would blink sleepily as his eyes drifted elsewhere for a moment as he let the situation go on its way.

He would mainly stay quiet only responding with a light “Uh-huh,” as he gave the other a Cheshire Cat like grin of innocence in face of the deadpan. Honestly, he had only been expressing surprise, so there was no need to make a huge fuss over his wording unless of course the other wanted to make a comment on it. Remaining open to whatever, the grin would eventually settle into a more serious expression as they began talking about rum and questions were tossed out.

“Eh? Mambi…Ughh…Waib,” he would hold up a finger as he took a moment and shook his head, the feather in his hair swishing a bit with the movement. Heh. He was straying to far off the path and going into a different sort of slurring. He was sure it wouldn’t be appreciated if he became completely unintelligible. Now then. The shake would get him back on track as he reopened his eyes and looked at the other as his hand dropped to the table and well polished nails began to drum the surface lightly as he leaned forward a bit. “There iz mamby tings that set ta rumz apart. Color camb tell ya age and strength o’ te drink. Ta namez of rumz camb give ya hintz about tastz. Brandz can speab ab’ut quality, buuh prizes camb do that too. The cheab stuff taze like shit or waber and ta prizer ones taze better. For tis, though, Jamaican rum leanz on da sweet sside, so web prefer it ober the biting and bitter. On top o’ tis, the brand ‘ere iz alwayz good for smoot drinkz,” he would say and then chuckling at the last bit he would continue. “No rumb? Hehe. Well now ya habe it under yar belt,” he would say and then pausing the grin would fade a bit as he became a bit serious. “Ya drink at all?” He had to wonder. After all, the guy did chug the first glass, but maybe that was just a fluke thing?

Well let’s test that. It seemed the other wasn’t against more rum, so naturally Rika would move so he could pour him another glass. He didn’t feel it to the brim, but he didn’t exactly go light handed on the other either. He’d give him a full glass not thinking anything to bad of it as he shrugged. “We dunno. Shoulb we be concermed?” he would respond back to the other’s inquiry about him drinking more. Honestly even if the guy did go overboard at least with him remaining at a floaty level he should be able to handle the guy...unless he was a violent drunk then that could be a problem…. Eh? Fuck it. Let’s just see where it went. Besides drunk or not Rika wasn’t dumb. He wouldn’t let it get too far out of hand….or would he?

Placing the bottle back on the table and off to the side of himself so he wouldn’t knock it over, Rika would prop his elbows on the table as his head went into his hands again as he heard the question posed.

“Whyb we drinkz?” he would repeat, a light chuckle would escape him as his right hand moved to play with his hair as he thought. “Welb. Moss o’ ta time itz ‘cauze we like to float from timb ta timb. Outsibe of tat, we’b only drank once due to wantin' to drowmb out pain. So mobstly funz. Hehe.”

It was the truth. Outside of one incident that was an exception to the rule, he did drink for fun and learned not too go overboard with said fun, so that was that. “Whyb ya wanna know though? Woub it madder if web had no rebeson?”

Emotions was a strange and tricky field to play on. They always shifted and reactions to things were as varied as the people that displayed emotions without shame. While it could be argued that the best thing to do was to comfort or try to get the other to talk, it could also be argued that silence and waiting was a solution too. Both had there ups and downs and neither path made navigating an emotional field easier. When it came to dealing with emotions, one just had to guess and pray their choice was right. Concerns about good and bad would have to be tossed to the wind and the game would have to be played by ear both by the one faced with the volatile ball and the one who was upset. Holding it all in was of course choice, but sometimes not speaking wasn’t a matter of holding it in, but rather a matter of being lost as to what to do or say and sometimes the only way to get untangled was to have something to respond to...like a question or comment.... Indeed one could argue the matter back and forth all day long, but in the end would find no true answer as far dealing with emotions went. You just had to ride the storm out and hope for the best outcome. End of story.

“Huh,” Rika would let out the sound as he stared upward at the ceiling? Sigh. Yes, he was staring at the ceiling and examining the cracks there with a spaced out look; however, despite that he was paying attention. He just had an odd way of showing he was thinking. “Welb….that makes sense, buh...what if poking waz ta only wayb to get to to the bottum of it all?” He would look back at the other. “We ain’t saying gamble carelesssly buh….We know somebtimez we cannot state tings clearly. It gebs caught up bad, so queztionss helb us. Give sum direction wimb lost.” He would try to explain, but wonder if the other would understand that. Silences weren’t always about waiting for something to happen after all. Well however that went, the blonde would continue to give Sharaku a dazed and serious expression for a bit, but then hearing his comment on drama queens, the blonde would grin.

“Sorry to burst bubblez, buh we ain’t that amazzzing,” the blonde would say with a chuckle as he played along. Yeah the day he supported drama queens or any of that nonsense would be the day he went insane for real or had been taken over by an alien life form. He already knew the toll of whacking people with emotions and honestly hated putting people through it when he couldn’t hold himself together, so when he saw people pulling stunts by using emotions to get attention or what not, it just made him frown in displeasure. Honestly there was no point or need for that sort of play in his book. Drama aside though, let’s talk about something a bit more serious…..

“Tch...Tellb us ‘bout id…” the blonde would agree softly as a faint smile crossed his lips. It would be nice not having to face all those pitfalls one digs for themselves along the path, but what was done was done and those skeletons never rest easy when the one that put them their turned to actually try and own up to what they had created and in turn change the life they lived. Nothing was every that simple or easy. Never. Anyway, Rika would fall silent for a bit as he stared at the table playing absent mindledy with his hair until the other spoke and gave him some advice. In response, he would look up at the other in a shy fashion and nod a bit. “M’kay. We will tryb ta remember tat. Thankss…” Eh slurring was slurring, but at least his tone was genuine, so this was okay right? Maybe. He would simply have to see what time revealed.

As for what happened past that. Well there was the issue of raised eyebrows in response to odd grins, but outside sleepy blinks and a light shrug to let whatever had died die in peace, there was no other words between the pair for the time being. Just the usual silence until it was broken a bit by the talk of rum.

Well, this one was a bit of doozy. Sure he had tried to explain the differences of rum and all that, but it would seem between his slurring and the other now drinking himself, there would be a disconnect as the dark haired male seemed to give up trying to understand him. “Hehe. Ax us wem we are sober if ya wanna know ubeless info like tat.” Welp that had happened, but the blonde was not exactly bothered by the issue for now since it seemed that only the explanation had been disregarded for now. He might've gotten made if the other had stopped responding to him period, but luckily the taller male was able to translate some things and respond back.

“Welb experience iz not bad to hab,” he would say. Sure you could have a bad experience, but even that taught you stuff if you were smart and learned from your mistakes that is. In any case, the blonde would lean his elbow on the table again and prop his head up with his left hand as he gave the other a light nod. “Tat’s cool.” Moderation was indeed good and while of the two he may be slightly heavier in the drinking department that did not mean that alcohol was his preferred drink. After all, he only went to it when he hit a deep low in life or intentionally sought it out like he did today. He also might drink one drink in a social setting where alcohol was present. The drink chilled him a bit in the otherwise anxiety inducing situation. Other than that though, he was pretty clean as far as drinks went.

Speaking of drinks, he would answer the question posed as he watch the other down half the glass in one go. He didn’t know why, but that was some amusing shit to watch. Maybe it was because he didn’t expect such behavior from this guy. Ah well.

“Eh? It depembs. Umless itz a party setting thanks to mum, I dun really drink withz people unless ya count Miki, but thatz like drinking with self. Hehe. Anywab, we drink alomb, buh appreciate company tat ain’t judging or lecturzing me cause we just wanna hab some fun or get a bit drunk. In ta end tho, it dun matter ib they drinck or noff...blah, Nokf.” So much for getting the simple out. At least he had gotten an answer out though how well the other would understand was another story. He wasn't lying with his words. He honestly could care less about another drinking or not drinking. All that mattered was the way the other party interacted and treated him in the end. Moving along though...

“Well tat is true. We wilb habe to pay ta piper in mornin’, buh zat is okay. Tis why we are only getting to float stabe. Less of slap to da heab later. As for funzz...Welb...it can be here and there. Dependz on the person tho…” It was fun for him here and there, but that was because he enjoyed the slight spinning and could gracefully handle the headache that followed next day. Though just because it was fun to him, the next person might hate drinking and disapprove of it heavily, so there was no clear answer for that question.

Speaking of clear answers. What was with the one given back? Rika would blink at the other a few times as he rocked in his seat a bit. “Albite,” he would say before sinking further down in his seat as his other hand came up to help support his head. “You okay?” he would ask taking note of the slow down in the other's speech. It wasn’t bad, but he had to wonder what that would mean if the other continued to drink. Would he just become quiet and ignore him? Or did something else happened? Hmmm...

And since when, really? That’s a rather pointless ‘What if’, since it’s never fully true. You don’t lose the ability to speak up until you get poked, so it cannot legitimately be the only way to proceed in any situation. Besides, why should the other side to know what to ask anyway? They could be just as lost, so expecting to be given a helping hand may not be your best choice of action. He would tilt his head with a questioning look. ‘’And why should it be? You have functional vocal chords whether you get poked or not, so I really doubt it would ever be the only way.’’ Only if you choose to be a hard ass and completely refuse to speak without it being pulled out of you, in which case, it’s mostly your own fault that nothing may get solved at all. Of course, it did sort of depend on the situation, but how often was it really bad enough to the point that searching for the needle in the haystack was truly a necessity? ‘’And I would beg to differ anyway. If you say nothing and wait, the other person may feel just as lost in the situation as you, because they have no idea what is happening and whether doing something is even the right choice of action. Automatically expecting them to be the one to break the ice is not something I would do, unless I was comfortable with the idea that it may very well lead nowhere at times. You can, but not everyone is going to put their hand in fire just because.’’ It’s either or. Sure, you can try that route, but it would be kind of childish to puff up like that and then complain that the other side did not try. Because you didn’t really either in that case, did you?

‘’Good thing that I don’t carry bubbles around in the first place.’’ While it was possible to disappoint him, it usually didn’t last him too long. Having expectations is nice, but getting hung over it forever once they’re broken helps none. And unless the offense done is a really unacceptable one, it’s generally not a huge deal anyway. Well, not enough of one for it to affect you for too long.

He would say nothing to the comment given in response, outside of a momentary amused look. Whatever it was on his mind would pass by quickly enough though, and he would only hum faintly when the blonde tried to thank him. To be honest, he had no idea what to say to that. Sure, he could debate on stuff back and forth nearly forever, but when things happened to end on such a note, it was like…now what? Or maybe he just found it awkward to say anything to expressions of gratitude in general, who knows?

Past that, a new round of silence would set in as neither of them bothered to speak up in the end, until the drinks turned it into a mild mess a while later. He would frown slightly. ‘’I probably won’t care at that point.’’ In fact, it wasn’t super important even now. Whatever kind, the final effect would be pretty much the same, and whether one likes the taste is individual anyway. So, whatever? Unless he was missing some important point, but he wasn’t about to fret about random possibilities right now. ‘’Maybe….’’ He was just not as eager for experiences in certain fields, that was all. Someone who isn’t an avid drinker probably doesn’t need to have tried every possible alcohol under the sun after all. What for? Unless you drink often, you won’t get to enjoy a lot of it either way. He tended to have a love/hate relationship with the stuff anyway.

‘’I find it to be somewhat boring either way….’’ What exactly was fun about this? He could at the very least see it if it was due to the company, but it seemed the other wasn’t after that. On your own….it’s just like…meh? There are a lot of less unpleasant result inducing things to do with yourself, in all honesty. Besides, if you happen to get to the point where everything seems fun because you’re totally drunk, you might not even really remember what you’ve done once you wake up the next day.

Hmph…’’Bite?’’ Well no, he knew that was not what the other had said, but it’s not like any real conversation was happening at that point regardless. And maybe he just had odd thoughts running though his head. That was an option too. He would close his eyes with a mild huff. ‘’I’m…fine.’’ He was fine, at least, he thought so. What would happen in time? It was hard to say, but maybe the other was right about him being more quiet. Still, outright ignorance wasn’t really his thing unless there was a solid reason behind doing so.

Oh boy….This conversation of speaking versus not speaking when someone was emotional was getting on a level that while Rika understood what was being said, his alcohol soaked mind was having a bit of trouble formulating clear responses back. A frown would come across his face as he reached up and scratched his head a bit as he remained quiet for a few seconds as he tried to get his wandering thoughts in some order to respond back at least.

“We ain’t sayin itss the only way. Web are sayin’ that sumbtimes you have to poke. Sure, we have vocal cordz and all; howeber, paim can makess it hard to getz it out. Whemb you already choked ub, a poke oftim helbs break the dam ssso to sspeakss,” he would begin and then hearing the rest he would blink a bit as his frown deepened. “Itz not an all the timb ting and homestly you sometimess habe to gamble when it combs to emoztionss. You ain’t alwayz gonna get it righbt and you may get bitten, buh even so…..the point iz you made da effort of tryin’. Showed you cared and thabt what makez the hard talkin’ easier. It ain’t a ting for every situzation, buuh, commumicatizion works wonders, even morb so when you’zss lost. At leaze that iss one method tat works forb us fromb time-to-tim. Juss a fum fact web guess,” He would finish with a sleepy blink as his eyes drifted over to the glass the guy had and then the bottle on the table as if he was debating something; however, whatever it was would pass as the blonde moved a hand to rub at his eyes being careful not to get make up in them in the process.

“Hehe,” he would chuckle lightly as he swayed a bit and let his hand drop to the table. he looked over at the other blinking with a sleepy smile on his face. “Tatz cute,” he would say amused as he let the idea of trying to carry a real bubble around without it being popped play in his mind for a bit. It was a entertaining thought that he was able to continue to keep floating a bit as another silence settled between them. Despite where his mind was, he would tilt his head at the other as he saw the amused look and then heard the hum as he thanked him for the advice earlier. He honestly didn’t know what else to do or say at this point, so he remained quiet as he scratched his cheek lightly and looked down with a soft smile. Though what he was smiling at was uncertain and perhaps something that honestly didn’t need to be questioned.

The silence continued to linger as Rika's small grin would fade a bit as the other spoke of not caring about the random facts. Did that hurt his feeling or offend him? Not really. He wasn’t bothered that the other didn’t want to hear random information. In fact, he wasn’t all that surprised at the answer. The other came off as the type that collected what he felt was interesting or useful to him, so he took the refusal as a sign the other wasn’t interested in alcohol at all and honestly wasn’t really looking for a true answer with his earlier question. Ah well. He could accept that, so in response to the short response the blonde would give a light nod of understanding. There was nothing else to say. As for the comment on experience and how fun drinking was, well that got a verbal response at least.

“It’z howeber, ya wish to look at ib. We personally fimb ib a bit fun, but tin again, hehe. We easily ambuse ourselbes with the randomnesss the drinkz cause upstairbs,” he would say with a light shrug and then grinning he would look up at the other. “Tat is a bit sssad tho. Web thought web might habe a new drinkin’ buddy. Hehe. So sad.” He would give a mock pout for a few seconds before the look was gone and his lopsided grin was back. He had his reasons to do what he did and if the other didn’t care for drinking then that was his deal. It honestly didn’t bother him much either way.

Huh?

The blonde would blink a few times as he heard the question from the other as he raised an eyebrow at him. “Web camb if chu wanna play that wayb.” Such an odd response. Was he simply playing off words there? It was hard to say and the blonde didn’t seem to want to make things any clearer as he let that go where it would. As for the last part, he would hum lightly. "Ib you say so," he would say, but outside of that nothing more as he fell silent and took to simply observe the other. It seemed the blonde despite being a bit drunk was starting to mellow out. Either that or he was running out of ideas on what to say to the other. With nothing on his mind at the moment, he would look at the bottle considering if he wanted another glass or not, but for now he made no move to call the waitress or bother picking up the bottle for that matter….

Well, he was so not really getting this either way. The point should be that both sides ought to be making the effort of trying equally, no? Like, if you got upset simply because you interpreted something wrongly, it’s not really the other person’s fault entirely, is it? So, saying that they have to risk it further just to show they care when they may not even understand what is it that they’ve supposedly done wrong is a little backwards.  He would shake his head slightly. ‘’My point is still the same though. Who says you’d be the only one lost? If you happen to get upset on accident by interpreting something the wrong way, the other person may not even realize they apparently did something wrong and that they are meant to do something about it. Besides, isn’t communication effort a two-way street? By clamming up and putting it on the other person to be the one to try making it work, you aren’t really making any effort yourself to begin with, are you? I’m not saying it cannot hurt and whatnot, but you can’t really assume that just because you’re hurting, the other person is automatically in a better spot to be making effort at that moment. Maybe they do care, and they just don’t know what are they supposed to do. Speaking to someone who looks like they may cry any moment can be just as hard as it is to say something when you’re upset, depending on what kind of a person one is. So, I would say that both sides ought to at least try, rather than choosing to pin it upon one to do it, if nothing else.’’ You can never know which one of you is actually in the less favorable spot after all.

He would frown slightly, staring off to the side absentmindedly. ‘’Cute…’’, he would echo the blonde’s words, but leave it at that, not really expanding on the subject. What was he thinking? Well, one could only guess at that point, or try to ask him…assuming it was worth the time to do so. Talking about cute things always had the potential to go ways. Past that, there would be a stretch of silence once again, until they spoke about the entertainment of drinking.

Eh? He would roll his eyes slightly, though whether that was just in jest or not was somewhat unclear. It would be up to the other to choose how to interpret that one. ‘’In all honesty, my mind can be random enough without needing any drugging to help it. It’s only amusing to a certain point, I’d say. Past that it just becomes annoying chaos, and I tend to have chaos at base as is.’’ Well, it was a slightly different form of chaos than the one caused by drinking, but he would say that the latter adding onto it did not help matters anyway. Plus, being woozy and whatnot only made him start feeling sick sooner or later. He couldn’t stand too much sense overload in general, and having it be craziness incarnate only made it worse. Sure, hangovers didn’t stick to him much unless he totally overdid it, but the state of being drunk was nothing to cheer for anyway. He would shake his head. ‘’Yeah…no. You don’t really want me to be. Unless you want to risk the drinking sessions being mostly me feeling sick. Which is something I doubt you would like.’’ Typically, he wasn’t dumb enough to go far enough to like…be sick enough to throw up, but there’s not much point of drinking often if you hardly ever get anywhere with it, is there? Might as well just not bother then, because it’s not very different from being sober.



…okay, well, maybe asking how okay he was, was actually legit. Though the other would perhaps find that normal, as odd as it in fact was? What was the chance? Regardless of that though, it would appear that his answer was being taken pretty easily, without any protests. ’’Giving up already…?’’

“Hehe,” the blonde would let out a chuckle of amusement as he shifted in his seat to lay his head down on his arms, his body shaking lightly with the lightly giggle fit. After a few moments, he would calm as he let out a sigh as he looked up at the other from under the strands of hair that had fallen forward as he gave the other a lopsided grin. “Web are arguing the samb pointz. Seez ta ting ‘bout pokin’ is tat it iz a two wayb effurt,” the blonde would pause to sit up a bit as he shook his head to get his hair out of his face. “The omb hurtin' maybe hurtin’ to ta point of being speesshless. Yeab silence worksss [i]sum[i] off ta time, buhhhh sumtims ya have to speakss firssst is all web were sayin’. To getz the ball rollin’ again, ya know? Youb say wait, buuhh sumtimez actin’ works better evemben if yar confussed as fuck. Tiz ain’t ‘bout one sssiding. 'Cause it ain’t in the end. Ta hurtin’ party sstill iz required to pull tear weight.” He was actually trying to explain an approach, but perhaps he was not as eloquent and clear about it and thus the friction. He wondered if he could make himself clear at this point or if the slurring would make it impossible to get a point across. Hmmm...He guess he had to wait and see.

Moving past confusing arguments, something different would catch the blonde’s attention as he made the cute comment. As he saw and heard the response, the blonde would narrow his eyes a bit with the grin that spread across his face. “Neehhh? Wha’ doess tat word getcha thinkin’, Sharaku?” The blonde was curious since the whole thing started with a frown...which typically hinted at displeasure; however, trying to apply that common trend to this guy was like trying to fit your foot into a shoe that was too small. It just didn’t work, so instead of letting it pass by or letting his mind concoct something, the blonde simply asked to see if he would be lucky enough to get some clarity on the matter.

Whether or not Lady Luck favored him, the topic would shift from whatever cute meant to the way one choose to drink. From reaction and words alone, Rika was unsure if the guy was playin’ about or truly annoyed with what he had heard, but instead of jumping to a conclusion and in turn reacting in a manner that would get him snapped at or shot down, the blonde choose a neutral path. He would keep a polite smile on his face as he glanced at the other casually listening to what he said about his state of mind.

“Heh,” he would begin and then pause as the waiter passed by. Stopping the guy, who was a bit confused now because he thought for sure he had been a lady the first time he spoke with Rika, the blonde would asked him to get a glass of water. The guy nodded and hurried off to perform the task as the blonde’s eyes drifted back to the other. “Soundss like quite the mind to contemb wiff. We too are chaotic, buhh in a different fassshion. More like we areb highly imaginatibe and the alcohol camb sumtimez make tat worse, buhh for the most part it chillz us out...amb makez uss a bit more social web suppose.” He had to admit outside of floating, the liquid did put him a chill mood after a while as shown by the slow decrease in his energy level the more they talk. On the flip side, it also knocked down his usual paranoid barrier making him less of a worry wart and in turn an awkward speaker. It made him more talkative, but it seemed after a few glasses he lost his ability to speak clearly without slurring. Eh. Well can’t be perfect.

That aside, the blonde would look up at the waiter as he sat the water down near him, but thankfully out of the way of being knocked over. He give him a sleepy smile of thanks causing the already ruffled guy to kind of laugh nervously before scuttling off. Heh, people and their judgement calls. Whatever….

Letting that slide off of him, he would sit up enough to drink the water draining the glass to nearly half point before setting it back down. As he let out a quiet content sigh, he would hear the other speak on why he was not a good drinking buddy. To this, the blonde would chuckle softly.

“Welb. We dun wantcha sick. If ya can't hold deer liquor dun drink. Buhh...um," he would pose to sniff in a bit to kill an itch in his before continuing. "Sorryb 'bout tat. Amywab... To be honbest, I dunno care if ya drank four glasses, one glassss or no glasszz. Drinkin’ buddy doesn’t necezariy mean ya’re obligated to drink..Nah, juss chilln’ and talkin’ over a drink or food or wha’ habe ya iz fimb too.” Drinking buddies was a loose term and only had drinking the title because he at least would probably drink a bit. That aside though, things would take a turn for the unexpected as the subject of biting came into play.

It was true Rika understood that what was being said wasn’t to be taken seriously, but with a smile like that and such an answer, the blonde couldn’t resist what he did next. It started with a quiet unreadable stare for a few seconds before the blonde's expression was relaxing as he spoke.

“Ya know, they say ya should be careful wha ya ax for.” His tones were soft as he gave a mischievous grin and then shifted in his spot so that he was right next to the other. Bring with him the scent of rum and surprisingly the hint of pleasant yet soft smelling soap, the blonde would lean in and actually try to nibble on the other’s ear. It wouldn’t be a hard bite if he succeeded, but it would be a bite nonetheless. Now what would come out of that was uncertain and entirely dependent upon the other. This could’ve been bad, but hey Rika choose to gamble and so in turn would take the consequences of what came after.

As for that last question the blonde would give the other a light shrug as he remained as charming as he could be when drunk as he answered. “Nah. Juss haben’t found anyting cleber or interesstin’ to say.”

Geez though. The blonde made it sound like the party in question needed to recover from a murder attempt or something. How does one get their feelings hurt so badly if it’s just an accident of some sort? To him, being speechless was like...a very high level of being hurt, in all honesty. Or maybe he just didn’t get how were some people so utterly sensitive, even when whatever started it wasn’t that bad at all. Well, regardless, it’s pretty hard to discuss something when you don’t even understand why certain points are a thing in the first place. He would furrow his brows a bit. ‘’You know, there is one thing I don’t understand. Don’t get me wrong, but I would perceive ending up speechless as a response to something extremely bad. In which case, it’s likely that the person did it on purpose and has no intention of making things better to begin with. Misunderstandings do happen, yes, but how does something even get interpreted so horribly to result in that? It sounds kind of over the top to me to be nearly choking yourself up on spot over something that was never even aimed to hurt in the first place. What would happen if it was? Apocalypse?’’ Personally, he would probably just get pissed at a person instead. Wrongly said words can hurt in a sense, but considering how it’s generally not even aimed to hit sore spots too hard when it isn’t a purposeful attack, should it really get you down on your knees like that? At this point, he really wasn’t sure just what kind of severity were they talking about, cause to him, this was more than he expected to be talking about in regards to accidental misunderstandings.

Hmm….He would at first say nothing to the inquiry about his thoughts, only to shake his head slightly a while later. ‘’I don’t even know. I can’t focus on it anyway.’’ Outside of maybe the fact that he hadn’t brought up the bubbles with the intention of the statement being called cute, but that didn’t really matter too much. He wasn’t thinking about it at that point, at least, not in a way that would warrant having some sort of detailed opinion on it.

Speaking of which, he would just continue thinking about things while the blonde busied himself with the waiter and whatnot. There was no need for him to butt into that, since he didn’t think he wanted to order anything at that point. ‘’I don’t find that it works for me. Feeling as if I had cotton stuffed in my head doesn’t equal chill to me, and being social is in fact harder when things are near to spinning around. Maybe if I managed to find a specific amount to make it work, but I’m not very keen on experimenting with something like that much.’’ It’s not a good thing to drink often, for whatever reasons, and it would probably take him pretty long to figure out whether he could make it work in a way that actually makes things better for him instead of leaning towards worse. Maybe it was something that changed from one person to another. Though he would say that most people acted like dimwits after drinking regardless of what they thought of themselves. You can’t judge yourself accurately even when your head is clear, and doing so when drunk probably results in lofty assumptions easily.

Moving on through a brief pause for water drinking though…

Well no, not exactly. He would huff faintly. ‘’That’s not quite what I meant. It isn’t that I can’t. I don’t really come off as drunk all that much easily. It just tends to not make me feel good. I guess my stomach doesn’t really like it a lot.’’ Regardless of that…’’Maybe I am not, but how many people would fancy coming with someone to a bar or the like just to watch their company get drunk while they sit there awkwardly and try to ignore the smell of alcohol?’’ It’s not always that great of an outing, depending on what happens and how it goes down in the end. He wouldn’t say it was his preference to spend time with someone who was getting themselves tipsy while he was there to sit and kind of keep watch and deal with it. Of course, there are always exceptions, but the base thought of it simply wasn’t very appealing.

And…now what? ‘’H..m?’’ Well, he knew that. Still, it’s not like he had expected the other to seriously act on it. While he hasn’t necessarily been trying to joke around, he hasn’t been all too serious either. It kind of just happened, with no special purpose behind it. Apparently, it was being taken way over the ledge though.


There would be no response at first, and he would just sort of stare ahead. While he didn’t push the other away initially, for he had no idea what the blonde wanted of him by coming close, he did almost jump when the biting happened. That…was definitely a bit weird. While the possibility of the guy actually going for it had always been there, he would have thought that at least the aim would be different. That said, freeze time would really only last for a blink, before he tilted his head to the opposite side slightly, as if trying to get away on instinct.



Confusion was high on this one, if nothing else. And it wasn’t helped by the fact that he wasn’t 100% sober either at that point, which definitely did not help when it came to thinking on spot. Then again, would that even be of any help in this situation? Maybe it would, maybe it wouldn’t, but an answer to that was pointless anyway.

Whatever came of that though…’’Ah well….’’

Well this was confusing, wasn’t it? This whole talk of being choked up and being speechless was going into places the blonde had not expect it to go as it became quite clear the other before him had a different perception on the matter at hand. As he heard the words, the blonde would process it all with a light hum as he leaned against his hands. “It camb signify tat dependin’ on ta situatiom,” the blonde said his speech a bit slower and a bit more clearer than before as a hand moved to twirl a piece of his hair absentmindedly. “Utter timez, it’z juss how sumb folk handle it. Web cannot explaim it ‘cause like ta reactionz iz different per hum--er personz. For examble, earlier web couldn’t speakss ‘cause off ta amount of smack down ya laid upon uss. Not really earth shatterin’ o’ seriouss. Juss wordz, buhh we couldn’t speaks. Surb, we camb back to it afteer a bit, buuhh we won’t alwayz do that. Sometimez a pry iz necessary. We don’t tink the matter can be like...summed up all nice ‘n’ all to make it ez to follow. And maybe it iz being ober sensitive, evemb so it still gonna happen, so juss thought to gibe you a small tip to help ya out when faced with us like tat is all. Mibite seems ubless, but eh. At leass tis converzation has revealed a bit of our tinking on the matter.”

It was kind of nice - these head spinning debates that seemed to go no where. At least through it all, he was learning about the way the other thinks and in turn he was able to try and file the lessons away so he could better adapt to and understand the guy with him. As for the last part of that, the blonde would smile sleepily as he let out a light snort. “Maybe ober ta top. Maybe not. Eberyone haz odd wayz of dealing with shit no one, buh timselves understandz. As for when shit actually is aimed to hurt, dunno. To sum it might be the end o' ta world, buhh for us….?” He would pause and think, his pretty face scrunching up with the thought as he stuck his tongue out a bit as he looked up and rubbed his chin. It was a goofy look, but he didn’t seem to care as he remained that way for a bit longer before his expression relaxed and he looked back at the other with a sleepy smile on his face. “We suppoze a flood of tearz. Might wanna inbest in a boat. Hehe,” It was a small joke, but also a truth. He...did indeed cry more than one would expect and it was his usual reaction when angry or scared. He couldn’t explain why it happened it just did...and no it was not just to get the other side to feel sorry for him or make himself out to be weak. It was just how some emotions came off. That and some pretty dark thinking. He was pretty fucked up when upset and if handled wrong that negative was only amplified. Thankfully what the other saw with Tamiki was agitation alone….If he were to truly be upset? Well depending on the guy, he was unsure if he would still hang around him after dealing with that.

That complicated matter aside, let’s move onto silence? Well, a little bit it seemed. The guy did answer his question in a way that didn't make room for more conversation. Whether the guy did this intentionally or not was questionable, but the blonde didn’t seem too bothered as he simply nodded at the other before looking about and shortly after busying himself with getting some water. During that time frame, there would be silence, but the blonde didn’t mind for it wasn’t one that lasted that long.

“We guezz itss different ‘cause outside of spinnin’ and bein’ a bit awful...Hehe albite….maybez a lot of awful in the speech department, we arb okay here. Juss a bit more loose lib and all. Like ta spinnin’ is albite...kind of usez to floatin’ in a haze normally, so tis ain’t so bad and I ain’t full on drumk. Tat is rare and ‘sides floatin’ is albite ‘ere and tere.” Yeah, he may have a headache tomorrow when he woke up, but that was nothing some food and water didn’t help. In fact, diluting what was already in him was exactly why he got the glass of water in the first place. Might require some trips to the bathroom later, but that was fine. At least he wasn’t going due to having to throw up. He already knew how it felt to be sick from drinking, so yeah unless it was a particular circumstance he wouldn’t go beyond just floating...a state he knew he could handle. “Az for balancing it all, eh...it'z good ter know yar limitz, buhh if it makez you sick right away tin, I dunno.” Kind of need to be able to stomach the stuff before trying such things.

Speaking of that…

“Mmm.” The blonde could easily understand that one as he nodded to the first part and then hearing the second piece, he would blink. “Not maby we supposez, buuh can’t really say either. Eberybody handlez ter stuff differently. Sum can hang with a drunk eazily and ubbers can’t. Tat ‘side tho, who said invitin’ ya out for a drink o’ food meant watchin’ us get drunkss? Web abmit we like to drinkss for fun in moderatizon and yeah...web get tipsy 'ere and tere for ta hell of it too, buuhh on a normal basis when we ain’t juss fucking around? Not realby. We take ta term "drinkin’ buddy" loobsely. Like a ton of lucy... Tere would be a drink involved ja, buhh...we typically dun tryin’ and make it like a drink fesss. Gotta plan for tat shit and gibe curtsey warnings to uffers.”

It was one thing to have a casual drink with someone and completely different thing dragging someone out with the intent to get drunk. He understood the drinking scene wasn’t for everyone, so if he was planning to get drunk he would rather give the other the option to back out...If he had the chance to offer that is. Sometimes folk did walk into things like how this whole thing got started….but if one was still sitting with him knowing he was tipsy, then he assumed they had signed themselves up for the long haul unless the other party decided to leave. In the end, the whole matter rested on how the parties involved handled or choose to absorb the situation.

Drinking aside though, maybe Rika had one too many drinks after all. Either that or he was more of a gambler than one presumed as he moved in for the next action. It was true the alcohol did make him less reserve and more open, but even so he never hide that he took a liking to either gender meaning flirting with a guy was just as easy as flirting with a girl for this blonde and maybe if he actually had true attachments to the one he was it, the ear biting could be seen as something more than what it was at this point: which was a test of limits and experimenting.

The ear could be classified as a spot for intimacy and perhaps in the situation going for the hand or arm would’ve been better, but Rika wasn’t aiming for the usual reactions. He wanted to see just how well the other handled something like this….and who knew maybe it was a hint at something else under it all, but the blonde sure as hell wasn’t making it clear as he took in the whole package with a casual eye.

The guy didn’t move away or shove him away and quite frankly didn’t do anything too horrible as he looked at him startled and highly confused. To his confused look, the blonde expression would soften as he looked up at him with a smirk as he heard his question.

“Mmmm. Nuffin’...” he would say softly and then with a sleepy blink he would move away and let the awkward moment stand, never explaining why he did what he did or giving any insight on what was going on in his mind. Rika could be strange, but was his action really pointless and out of fun? Who knew.

That aside though, things would drift into silence for the blonde didn’t have much to say at the moment to further the conversation. So as he let his mind float, he would look down at the glass of water debating if he wanted to finish it now or not….

Well...this didn’t really answer anything. It only felt like the blonde was basically repeating himself, since he didn’t feel as if the matter was any clearer at all. So, what...some people choose to ‘handle’ things like that by cowering? He just had a hard time seeing how that kind of reaction was goof for anything unless you wanted to kill the conversation on purpose. Regardless, he would simply raise an eyebrow. ‘’And if one were to just refuse to humor you and risk it, then what? Would you simply sit there and twiddle your thumbs in silence forever?’’ Like, you can’t do that for ages, can you? Not everyone will decide to try bothering you, and if they never do, what would happen then?

In the end he would just shrug. ‘’If you say so. But certain ways may not give the best impression of yourself to those that get to see them.’’ It depends, but how many people would truly want to deal with a possible crybaby? Things like that would likely happen fairly early when the other side doesn’t know you well enough, and an episode like that can make them steer away from you before it gets anywhere beyond just being acquaintances. And he doubted the blonde went around explaining such things to people before they had a chance to happen. ‘’No..thanks.’’ Now that was a mildly disturbing thought. He had no idea how to deal with crying people, and he honestly would not choose to do so under normal circumstances. Not unless he had a very good reason for wanting to stick around instead of letting someone else handle the situation. Which they would probably do much better anyway, whoever would it be.

Silences and water aside however, the talk would eventually turn towards the subject of the beverage in front of them. He would frown slightly, crossing his arms over his chest. Yeah, no. ‘’Maybe for you, but I find the spinning extremely displeasing. I would probably get a headache or feel sick just from that alone.’’ While he didn’t get motion sickness normally, it was a different thing when the ‘movements’ were caused by stuff like alcohol. That wasn’t even real motion, just an upset internal balance, and that had a way worse final effect on him in the end. To be honest, that was probably the main reason why he could feel horrible pretty fast, and sadly being woozy can come pretty quickly, without even having drunk all that much yet. ‘’Not always. I suppose it depends on what I drink and whether I’m having a good day. I don’t know.’’ He couldn’t say for sure. Sometimes it happened pretty fast, and sometimes he was fine for longer. That, and he didn’t drink often enough to be able to tell the exact requirements for things to happen.

Eh? He would tilt his head slightly. ‘’Then why even use that term for it at all? It can come off as misleading if the person doesn’t know you aren’t even trying to invite them to what it appears as when it’s said.’’ If pretty much almost no drinking is happening, then your company isn’t really being a drinking buddy, are they? It’s more of a hang-out buddy or something akin to that, perhaps. Or whatever. Frankly, he didn’t do things like that often in the first place. Not the most typical idea he’d have in mind when wanting to meet with someone, as much as some food can be nice at times.

Speaking of food, guess he was the food now? Well, sort of. It would have been bad if the blonde actually tried to bite his ear off literally. He would definitely not fancy that one. What did happen though, was equally as odd anyway, considering the situation and how well they knew each other at that point. He would keep his confused stance for a while longer, but eventually shake it off with a few blinks as he absentmindedly rubbed his ear with one hand, giving the blonde a faint sneer. ‘’Yes, nothing. And I am also a unicorn then.’’, he would state with a somewhat sarcastic tone. He could take avoiding an answer in certain situations, but this was not one of those. You don’t do something like this and then just casually claim it was nothing.

And then…more silence…?

Heh. No clarity would be gained it would seem, but the blonde was not rattled by this at all. To be honest, this was a topic that words simply could not illustrate. Sure one could pick at it all day long, but without coming into a situation where the methods being spoken about were being used? Well there was only so far words could go, even less so when the pair speaking viewed said issue so differently.

The blonde would blink, but only open one eye for a moment as he focused on the other’s question. “Forber iss a long time, hehe,” he would begin with a light giggle, but then just as quickly he would become serious as he reopened his other eye. “Buh ta answear yar questzon. No. Web juss habe ta mobe omb.” It was true no matter how hurt he got, he wouldn’t linger in silence forever even if he did become speechless. If the other party didn’t put a foot forward and ask from time to time to get more clarity on something or try to at least assist with figuring an issue going on, then the blonde had his ways of dealing with the unpleasantness...though whether those ways were good or bad would remain a mystery. Regardless of that though, it seemed that the answer given was the shortest and most straightforward the other had gotten the whole time and it would seem the response to the next set of words would follow suit.

“Heh. Maybe not, buh ya can’t alwabys be esspecting folk to put tere bess foot forwarb all te time eiber.” People were a complicated mess by nature, so was it even surprising that the more you hung around or talked with someone, the more they were going to reveal things that made the you think certain things about them whether or not said thoughts were valid or not? And if said things were red flags and chased the other party away, then didn’t that mean they simply weren’t meant for the one they ran from on any level of relationship? Sure one could argue time cured everything, but usually the way one treated you was the way they would almost always treat you regardless of words said and things done.

There were exceptions to the rule here and there, but most of the time if someone treated you like trash or saw you as lower than them, then more than likely that was how it was going to be. Swaying people was a hard thing to do and while one could fix some things, unless one were to mold themselves to be the perfect copy of what the other party expected, there was always going to be something that was displeasing to be found about the one you were with. The only thing that really mattered was how those involved choose to handle the whole thing. That was just how reality worked.

Risk and what not aside, the blonde would tilt his head at the other as he made his comment to the whole crying bit. “So like doez ta mean we arb forbidden ta cry aroumb ya?" The blonde wore a smile and the words came out lightly, but if the other paid close attention to the blonde’s eyes and body language, he would find the question was actually more serious than the surface suggested. It wasn’t that the blonde was trying to make a judgment call here or anything of that nature. No he just wanted to know what the other would do if he did end up having to deal with tears. Would he walk away? Wait it out? It was a point of interest for the blonde who was not always the best at keeping himself together all the time.

Well wherever that went it would go as the conversation moved from emotions to drinks. A kind of ironic transition considering sometimes the pair went hand-in-hand. Just like how much one can enjoy the drinks and their effects also went hand-in-hand. So to what was said, the blonde would nod a bit as his eyes drifted from the glass of water in front of him to the man he chatted with. “Tat iz umberstandable.” Spinning wasn’t for everyone and honestly outside of himself, he wasn’t sure how many others actually handled that sensation well enough to find it enjoyable. Maybe he was the odd ball here and Sharaku’s reaction the more normal of the two. Who knew? Maybe they were both odd in the situation. “Huh...makez sensse.” A response to a topic that explained itself. Drinking was a strange game that had so many factors in it that maybe one couldn’t find the right combinations of triggers and what not that caused one to become sick and have a bad time. Even an experience drinker like himself wasn’t absolutely sure what did what to him, he simply knew what he liked, didn’t like, and what to stay far far away from. There was no equation there. Just experience.

Moving from drinks to using correct terms? Well, it most certainly seem that way as the taller male question the term "drinking buddy" and why it was being used if in fact it didn’t always mean that a ton of drinks were involved. To this the blonde paused as he blinked a bit, his expression blank at first, and then seeming to become confused he would frown as he looked over at the other. He would tilt his head one way and then the other before blinking a few times and then shaking his head, he would shrug. “We never dug into the technicalities of it all. It is juss a term that setss up ta expectazon tat drinkss are tere. Nuffin’ in ta term suggestz the omb invitin’ iz espectin’ ya ta drink to.” A drinking buddy was in the end someone you could hang out without having to worry about judgment being passed thanks to drinks. By becoming said buddy that was permission for either side have at the bottle and everyone was cool about it. Nothing misleading about it...Unless of course you took the words literally.. “Drinking buddy” was just as odd as the term “my friend”. They were both used loosely to signify politeness or in the case of the former, what sort of wagon you were boarding when going out with the other. No one really picked such a terms apart did they? Well okay. Maybe Sharaku did, but outside of him? Rika honestly had never been challenged on that front. How strange to get technical about a common term.

On the note of strange though, let’s talk about stranger. So about this whole biting business. What was the blonde’s real intent behind the bite? Was it a hint at something? An experiment? An action taken to see what sort of reaction he would get? All were valid questions, but ones that the blonde didn’t seem to answer and in turn seem to maybe step on the other’s toes in the wrong way. He would return to his spot a respectful distance from the other, observing the reaction with an amused smile that hide his true thoughts from the other. The blonde would pick up the glass of water and drain the rest of it before sitting it down quietly. As he folded his hands and rested his chin on them, he would see the sneer from the other and hear the words, but instead of getting ruffled or anything like that he remained calm with that amused smile on his face.

“Ya dun say.” he would respond in rather chilled tones at the remark about being a unicorn as he narrowed his eyes as if he was trying to see if the guy was lying or not; however, he wouldn’t push the play forward as he kept an eye on the other and tilted his head to the left. “Mmm. Itz nuffin’,” he would repeat and then blinking sleepily he would continue. “Areb ya boffer by it? Mah actizon we meanss.”

The words were spoken in laid back tones as if it was really nothing, but why was that? And why did it seem despite how the other was acting,Rika seemed to be enjoying what he was occurring? What was his game? Was it game at all? So many confusing and unanswered questions today...That and a good deal of silence later on too.

Oh really? To be honest, he found random giggles kind of annoying and whatnot, but that thought aside, he wouldn’t end up responding much. He just didn’t really have anything to say to that. Plus, he didn’t want to keep going with this discussion forever on all fronts, seeing as they would probably only keep going in circles again and again. There’s only so much you can say about one topic before it becomes a broken record on repeat in a sense.

He would opt to comment on the next part though, fixing the blonde with a questioning look. ‘’And expecting something less or the worst is better how? If one does that, won’t they come across like they think of the person lowly enough to assume it likely won’t be very good right off the bat? Would you rather have people not even bothering to believe that you could do your best? I’m not saying everyone should always pick the most perfect path, but I would say that hoping they can indeed do their best is better than being a downer in your thoughts about them at base.’’ You know, if nothing else, expecting the best out of a person shows that they are willing to believe you can in fact make a great impression, as opposed to just settling for mediocre and being ‘whatever’. If you’re not even going to hope that the person will come off in a good way, what does that say about how much of a damn you give about them in that area?

That aside though, the topic of crying would come up next, and he would frown faintly. ‘’Well, it’s not like I’m your boss or anything, so I can’t forbid you from doing things. I’ll just say that I’m probably not the best company to stick to when you want to do that. There are likely better choices you go go with.’’ He just wasn’t that type of person. There were probably plenty people around who knew how to deal with these things better, so while he wasn’t going to stop the other, he simply wouldn’t recommend himself, is all. Besides, he would honestly rather not deal with that unless it was necessary. If it were a valid choice, he would not decide to hang around weeping people willingly. Definitely not just like that.

The drink related convo that followed afterwards seemed to be kind of coming to a halt as short comments were given, not really prompting any kind of further response or follow ups to the topic at hand. Thus, that one would slowly drift into silence as well. Unless the other decided to bring something more up, that is.

Seemingly they wouldn’t move away from drinks that fast though, as the subject proceeded to be combined with buddies eventually. At what was said, he would snort lightly. ‘’Well, it just doesn’t make sense to me anyway. ‘Drinking buddy’ sounds like a label to call someone, but even if that someone might be okay with drinks once in a while, maybe they won’t always want to see a drink in their vicinity, whether it’s theirs or the other person’s. I know I wouldn’t. What does that make them then? Seeing as the term suggests they would always be the kind of person you go after if you want to involve alcohol somehow.’’ If someone isn’t always okay with the set up, can they even be called that? Because at that point they’re more like an occasional drinking buddy at best, and it doesn’t really fit as an appropriate general label anymore. And he just didn’t like the suggestive undertones of it in the end.

Definitions and the like notwithstanding though, there were a lot more complicated issues coming up once that was past. In all honesty, the blonde was not helping himself by trying to be mysterious and dancing around the subject. He did not want to deal with that at all. Maybe if the situation was different between them and all, but it’s not like they were getting along spectacularly 24/7. So, what was he supposed to actually think of this? He did not appreciate being played around with on this kind of front in general, and the other had already been lucky that he did not choose to be unpleasant over the action done in the first place. Seeing as he very well could have been, given their general standing with each other. It just doesn’t seem like the best ground to be making these types of advances, regardless of the intention behind them. And even if the intention were to be acceptable, that fact matters shit when you don’t bother explaining yourself, doesn’t it? Maybe he did get only a bit sarcastic last time, but he had been rather serious about expecting an answer. This was the kind of situation he simply hated to get casually blindsided in, like it was some game to be playing. Trying to fool around with something like this is risky in general, so you had better be careful who you do it with and how.

Gritting his teeth a bit, he would glare at the blonde sharply. If the other had at least a decent ability to pick up on things, he would probably realize this was not about to be a chill game of playing around. In fact, the shoot offs that happened between them in the past would likely look like they were really just nothing compared to this one. The taller actually gave the vibe and impression of getting pissed this time around, unlike his usual ‘cool’ kind of approach to matters. ‘’I would really prefer you don’t ‘nothing’ me. I do not appreciate being toyed around with in this manner. If you want to do things like this, don’t just try to wiggle out and pretend there was no reason. I refuse to be someone’s plaything. To answer you though, I don’t know. Never had someone do something like that, so I don’t know what to think of it. What does bother me though, is your attitude towards it. I wasn’t aware that we are apparently suddenly chummy enough for you to start crossing that kind of line, and then just play it off as if it were an amusing joke. Unless you want me to bite you in the ass in return and say it was just ‘nothing’?’’ He was obviously far from happy about this, but from that point, it would be up to the blonde to handle the situation. What would happen…?

Well it seemed that the discussion of silences due to emotions had died. A good thing considering neither side was going anywhere with the matter. The taller male held firm on his position and while they were technically speaking on the same thing, but with some differences here and there, Rika wasn’t going to be able to clearly explain a thing that honestly had to be experienced to understand. So the blonde didn’t do anything to try and save that conversation as it naturally died off.

With nothing to say the blonde would hum lightly as his eyes drifted elsewhere for a few seconds before returning to the man with him as he gave him that look and spoke on the best foot forward subject. “Hmmm?” Rika would tilt his head as his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Where did that come from? He would be quiet for a moment as he processed it all and then shaking his head he would speak. “Tat wasn’t even mah point. All I waz sayin’ waz tat we all habe good ‘n’ bad dayz. Sometimbes we walk out amb do beautiful at performbing the dancez of life. Utter dayz we kimb of fall short or trip up and fall flat on our facez. It hab nuffin’ to do with makin’ an impression or beliefs tere,” he would pause a bit to think.

“Though to amswer your questions, it dependz on how ta person in question presentz tings. For examble: A perzon tat constantly downz someone or doez not hide ta fact tat tey arb lookin’ down on someomb. Those types expect ya to fail and dependin’ on howb persuasive they iz, they camb make one become ezactly what tey say they are; howeber, letz say you arb dealing wiff the aberage joe and not sum asshole. Ta board shifts ‘cause now we can’t say what tey tink umless tey say someting. So we could go down ta path being all friembly and shit and web neber know if said personz is downing us or dissin’ us cause it is in tere head. The truth wouldn’t come out unless somefink shook ta formula or the one hatin’ just decided to say fuck it and juss stop playin’ with ya. In ta end peeps are gonna tink what they want some more obvious tin another. Web lobe to tink moss expect ya to do yar bess or habe hope you would, buuh the peepz aren’t alwayz easy to reab. So I kinda dun ponder it too much and dun make a scem ‘bout it unless somefink cropz up tat makez becomin’ hostile valid.”

The blonde would give a light shrug after that. In the end, he could not mind read, so if a person looked down upon him internally there was nothing he could do about it unless they made it known to him that they were doing said thing. As long as it remained hidden, he had to follow what could be potentially a lie and pray if it was a good lie it was true. One could only go with what they were given even if they hoped the world as a whole wouldn’t be an ass or arrogant towards them.

Moving from thoughts to crying, the blonde would take into consideration the words spoken his expression unreadable as he watched the other and raised an eyebrow slightly. “Oh and wut hap’ens if yar ta omby company we haz?” He had to wonder. If he broke down, it wouldn’t be due to a desire to do so. No it would just happen. The other said go to others, but who would he go to, especially if he say broke down right here? He wasn’t going to go to a stranger, so that honestly left the man before him. Of course, Rika could walk away, but if he did that his first choice wouldn’t be to go towards people, but rather to find some place where he could be alone. The guy wanted to brush the matter off onto others? Well what happens if that was simply not possible to do? What then?

Leaving that curiosity where it was, the conversation would die down a bit as most of the drinking conversation became matters of silence as short answers were given and no comments were returned. The only portion of the conversation that lingered for now was actually less about drinking and more about the use of the term “drinking buddy”. It was an odd topic and one that the blonde never imagined he would get into a deep conversation about. Did it annoy him? Not really, but he could not deny it was a questionable thing. Honestly, what was Sharaku even getting at with this? Was it really a matter of correct terminology or was this just some odd dig at the way language was used in general? It really was confusing and the blonde did not hide that fact as he scratched his head a bit and looked over at the other.

“Well if you wanna get that technical, then we supposed we camb say hang out buddy,” he would say a bit uncertain of where this was going or why this was even occurring in the first place. It didn’t have to make absolute sense, did it? Honestly it was all the same despite the label. Whether or not drinking was part of the title, that did not change the fact that said person marked as “buddy” or “friend” was the one you turned to when you wanted to hang out or what not. So what was the big deal? He...just didn’t get it. And to be honest this seemed a bit too picky for a rather general term.

That matter aside though, it would seem the conversation would go from chilled to flat out unkind in an instance as the other would not let the matter of ear biting go so easily. Being a creature that could read emotions more or less well, he saw the reaction the man gave to him and he could see clearly that the sparks flying here were actual anger rather than something like annoyance. Even so the response the blonde gave back was a surprisingly calm one as the blonde met the glare with an even stare as his smirk disappeared and for the first time during this whole encounter, the blonde remained serious.

He didn’t answer right away as he let his right hand drop to the table and his fingers take to drumming the surface lightly as he watched the other. It almost seemed as if he wasn’t going to answer him, but then the blonde would blink and speak, his speech pattern seeming to clear up the more the situation seem to sober him up.

“Up ‘til now we didn’t realisse tere was a line,” he began calmly and then would pausing he would take a breath in and let it out before continuing as he narrowed his eyes at the other. “You wan uss to break it down? Tell why? A’rite we can do tat, but first to answer yar question. If ya bit me in mah azz and said it was nuffin’ I’d call it bullshit if it occurred after what had we juss did. Seembs vengeful to us. Also, web love ta know how ya planned to get such a target when web are sitting on it and would actually put up a fight if ya went below da belt. ‘Sides. We didn’t aim for ass. We nipped yar ear. A spot that is fair play in tese sort of games,” he would pause in his drumming of the table and hold up a finger telling the other to pretty much hold his tongue and let him finish before continuing on. “Now to break tis all down. First off, look around ya. We hab a mix bunch of peeps and alcohol flows freely hebe. Now we aren’t the worse customer herb. In fact, we are rather tame and while it can be said we crossed a line under normal circumstances, most drinkin’ don’t think lines and just do shit because they simply can. We don’t doubt if you hab crossed someone else here they might’ve done something similar if not worse to ya with all intents and purposes to get into your pants so to speak. Yar pretty man, so web wouldn’t blame someone for trying there luck with ya. And ya don’t have to be chummy to play those sorts of games or become a plaything in this arena either. Itz the nature of the place,” he would pause as he took to absentmindedly rubbing the rim of his glass as he kept a serious stare upon the other.

“Secondly, while yar getting mad with uss, are ya not the one that set yourself up for this sort of play to happen? True, we could’ve opted not to do anything or maybe bite your neck, shoulder, arm, or even hand. There are plenty place we could’ve bitten, but tat ‘side the point. The point iz as soon as you said sure, did it not cross yar mind that there was a 50/50 chance web would actually do it simply ‘cause the set up to go for it waz tere?” The blonde would pause to let the other absorb that before continuing. “Az for this whole nothing thing. My intent was purely experimental and play. Play ‘cause honestly we thought ya and us wereb on the same page when ya said sure. Experimental because web wazn’t sure what yar reaction would be if web actually bite you. We wanted to see yar reaction and web got what we wanted.  Az for why I chose the ear, it was simply because I gravitate towards them when I flirt or play and honestly anything above the belt is far play when engaging in these sorts of flirty or mischevious playz. If ya didn’t wish for any of this to occur, tin why did ya open such a door where that potential waz high?”

The blonde would go silent from there watching the other with a surprisingly neutral expression. He wasn’t mad or displaying frustration as he simply laid the facts down for the other. Honestly why was he going off the hook and getting after him for doing something that was quite normal in such a setting and very tame in comparison to what could’ve happened if he was a more rowdy or aggressive sort. Sure, he had taken a risk with the action, but the other had gambled too had he not? So why was it suddenly wrong for him to do what he did, even more so when the other never gave signs he was crossing a line to begin with? What the hell did he expect? 100% nothing?

Eh? Wasn’t that kind of beside the point itself? Considering how they were talking about typical reactions to things, he wouldn’t say that equals to just having occasional bad days. Not when you at first imply it is technically normal for you to display such behavior in those kinds of situations. He would tilt his head a bit. ‘’I wonder how relevant that really is. The way you spoke about things before implied clamming up and all is a rather typical reaction in such situations, in which case, can it really be called a trip up on a bad day? Seems more like a habit to me, seeing as it’s a repetitive occurrence rather than something that happens as a one time fail on a bad day. That’s why I’m talking about impressions and whatnot there. Having a bad day is one thing, having a reaction pattern you follow is another.’’ Could those really be spoken of equally? Doing something unsightly on accident happens, and it can be called having a bad day, but if you do the same kind of thing repeatedly here and there, it turns into a habitual pattern. In which case, isn’t it something you’d be aware of and maybe try to work on? It’s not just an ‘oops, that wasn’t meant to happen, sorry, having a bad day today’ anymore, but something you probably expect to happen ahead of time.

Hm? ‘’Is it really that hard to tell? I would think they don’t even have to admit it directly for you to know. It could just be the way they react to you doing things. If you do something that can be considered weird and crazy and they act as if they don’t find it unexpected at all, doesn’t that imply they thought you to be a weirdo from the start and aren’t surprised to see you doing such things at all? It can be harder to figure out at times, but I think a lot of people give their stance away unconsciously, if you know what to look for.’’ Though, if you try to over-analyze what you see, you may end up landing yourself into a deep hole. So, guess the method isn’t entirely foolproof. Still, it can give you hints if nothing else.

Moving past that, the next topic was getting mildly uncomfortable. He really couldn’t say. Crying people don’t all act the same during their break down in the first place, and he just didn’t know how to react in general. It was nearly impossible to hypothesize what he would do in the end, as that highly depended on the specific situation at hand, and what caused it to happen. If anything, he was probably better at dealing with it when he wasn’t the cause of the crying and the person came to him due to some other reason. If he was…well, it would likely get pretty messy, and there were many ways that could end. He would look off to the side somewhat awkwardly. ‘’I don’t know. I’m just saying that I’m probably far from being the best at comforting people, that’s all. So, it may not be worth it for you to stay around me, expecting that I’m going to handle the situation smoothly. What I’d do exactly would likely depend on why it happened in the first place and how you would react yourself, so I can’t quite tell….’’ He didn’t want to claim something random now and then eventually act differently if it happened later. He would try to do what seemed appropriate to him, but it had already been shown that his views often do not align with those of others, so it was a tough game.

He would shrug lightly at the fact that the other seemed to consider the discussion too technical. ‘’Is it? I don’t see questioning matters as a very technical thing. I’d rather do that than accept everything just because someone has decided that the meaning of a term ought to be what they think. Many things can be viewed from different angles, so not like there’s only one correct interpretation.’’ It would certainly be easier if there was, but that’s not how ‘words’ work. And he liked to know why was something supposed to be a certain way before accepting the idea of it. Rather than just be ‘oh okay, whatever you said is the ultimate truth for sure’ right away.

Moving on towards muddled waters though, it would seem another clash was hanging over their heads once again. He would listen alright, but he definitely did not agree with the kind of view that was being presented. Who ever said that it is ‘fair game’ just because you decided to believe it is? Seeing as it can easily be a thing you just do not do to everyone you see, can it really be assumed to be ‘okay’ without question? That was a risky gamble in his opinion. One day, you may receive a fist in the face for trying that nilly-willy. And it will hurt.

The corner of his lips would twitch slightly, but he would keep to simply staring at the other flatly for now. ‘’Well, for one, I honestly don’t give a single fuck about the ‘norm’, or whatever you want to call it. If someone goes and drinks themselves stupid enough to do that, it’s their fault, and I would not label that as a valid excuse for acting like a slut towards others. Want to do that? Be ready to possibly kiss the floor instead. You say it’s the nature of the place? I call that kind of behavior rather disgusting. Stick a hand down your own pants if you really have the urge to do those things. Some people may be here just to spend their free time chilling, not to deal with drunk-ass creepers. The only thing a person who chooses that kind of approach would earn from me is a loss of respect. If you can’t flirt with at least some tact to begin with, stay the fuck away from me and go after some other slutty person. I don’t care. I’m not looking to hook up with just about anyone regardless of how they act towards me.’’ He didn’t want that kind of shit. Besides…he hadn’t even done that kind of thing yet, so why would he want to start trying in that manner? That’s just a complete turn off, and completely eww if they’re drunk to boot, not even considering the fact that going far with some random stranger too soon is just…somewhat unwise?

Outside of expectations towards manners though…’’And two…well, excuse me for not sharing your mindset. I don’t like playing around and being pulled by the nose when it comes to these ‘flirty’ behaviors. Not when it wasn’t established beforehand that it is fine between us. You may think it’s ‘fair game’ to fool around with that, but I can’t see it that way. If you don’t actually want to go somewhere with that, then don’t do it. I’m not there for someone’s amusement and games when it comes to possibly serious things.’’, he would shake his head. ‘’As for why I let it happen? Well, I wouldn’t really mind a bite in general. I just assumed you would pick a less questionable place if you went for it, so it’s in fact not beside the point in my opinion. Or not act like you’re just trolling me if you do something like what you have. I wonder though. You act like it’s normal, but would a lot of people actually go for that kind of thing and honestly expect no possible backslash? Because if that is how you see things, then I am sorry for not being a fan of having people make moves on me for the lols, but I just simply don’t find it pleasant. It’s not very funny, and would you actually want to be seen as the type of guy who is a player and gets cozy with people too easily?’’ He was really interested in knowing that. He was willing to accept flirting and whatnot without prior agreements, don’t get him wrong there. However, if you go that route, you better be serious about wanting to see some result from it. Don’t just be all ‘oh, I felt like being yolo, I don’t even mean it’. Those kinds of people could honestly fuck off, in his opinion. Mainly if they did it casually and didn’t even give a thought about how they might be impacting their victim.

Rika would tilt his head in the opposite direction of the other as he heard the words spoken. “It seembs we are on two different pagez. We misunderstood and thought chu waz speakin’ of imprezions in general. Mah bad,” he would say and then trying to process what the other said, he would blink and continue. “Ta recation we spoke of I guezz could be considered a pattern if wanna call it tat, buuh ta statement kind of appliez stillb justz on a different lebel. There’s lezz trips involbed az it all startz to leam on instinct or habit. Regardlezz if ta person viewin’ the bad habit is all like he’llb alwayz be like tat why bother, ten tat iz justz how tey are gonna view uz. Whileb you could aruge web could changez the actionz to get a better reactionz. In ta end, eberyone won’t keep high hopez for somemb like uz. Mozz juss kinda frown and walk awaby. Guezz tey don’t habe time to bother wiff uz….So we juss got ussse ta da negative viewb.” Putting your best foot forward whether it was just a general thing or not was not always possible, even less so when it came to emotions which were unpredictable and hard to push through all the time.

He was going to clam up or cry about certain things, and he was not going to hide that fact. Sure he could change, but would that really help in the end? Was it worth, trying to speak up when the mind was scrambled and nonsensical? Or trying to hold back tears just so someone wouldn’t get the impression you were a crybaby and in turn potentially look down on you? He honestly didn’t know as his eyes drifted to look back down at the table.

He would only ponder the matter for a short while though before the other was speaking on being able to read others. “Sometimez it playz like tat and sometimez ta hints are clearb, but on the thought of no reactionz….How about youb, ya didn’t seemb to react ta a ton ta stuv happenin’. Granted, we haven’t pulled our weribest shit, buuh woulbn’t you say we are strangbe? And in turn by ya juzz kind of observing wiff a blank face meanz you doin’ tat to? Expectin’ nuffin’ but oddness out of us? Or maybe even negatively judging us when we did clam up? Areb you hinting at yar true thoughtz on uz or utters?” He understood that there were other ways to figure out what a person thought of you outside of just having them say it, but that was going under the assumption that said person was actually easy enough read and in turn one could pick up on those hints; however, when faced with people that were more wall like or even emotionless what then? How could you tell what you if what you saw was actually what they were thinking about yourself or someone else? Even by quietly analyzing the cues with this sort, one could never be sure if they were on track or not. Did this mean question everything? Not really, but Rika always remained a bit skeptical of the subtle cues he caught onto, never really accepting them as truth until some form of proof made it quite clear that what he understood was correct. After all, cues could mislead when left to the mind alone to speculate on.

That odd matter aside, the topic would make a full circle back to emotions as crying and how the other handled it came to the front. As Rika listened, his usual smirk would fade as he observed the other for a moment and then blinking, look away as his eyebrows furrowed a bit.

“We dunno expect smoothness when we cry and ta be honest hugs and sweet talk aren’t requirementz eifer. Juzz the fact ya didn’t run away or chaze us away when we were at our worze is enough for us….” the wordz were spoken softly and in a different tone that suggested that while the answer wasn’t clear cut that the blonde had swallowed it rather well and appreciated the honesty. Despite what he revealed, he didn’t seem to push it any further than that as he became quiet for a bit as he watched a group of girls giggle as one of them fell out of her chair. Usually that sort of stuff amused him, but this round his mind was elsewhere, so outside of the passing glance, he didn’t take the scene in too much.

He remained in his thoughts until the conversation had gotten to the odd point of picking the term “drinking buddy” apart, an affair he found quite strange to be part of. As he heard the words spoken, he would scratch his head a bit as he raised an eyebrow at the other. “Eh? Well, we suppose so, buuhh that still doesn’t make this any less strange for us. Web neber encountered someone tat did tis. Not tat its bad. It juss caught us off guarb.” He could respect looking at things from a different point of view. In fact, he welcomed that sort of thought pattern. That is how one learned and began to understand something or someone. He just never applied said thought pattern to something as trivial as words. He let words be what they were because in the end their common meaning got the point across, so why bother picking at it? Heh. Well that fun matter aside things would begin to go downhill as the conversation shifted to something less pleasant.

Rika would hear the other out, the blonde remaining unusually quiet as he kept the serious and hard to read gaze upon the other. He would take in the words and absorb each one of them as true anger began to fill him up; however, unlike Tamiki who just blew a lid and let the other have it, Rika’s reaction was a quiet one as he studied the other for a few seconds with narrowed eyes before looking away as he closed his eyes a bit, the tapping on the table a bit quicker than before as he seemed to be dealing with some emotion internally. When he opened his eyes again he would look over at the man with him with a cold glare.

“Don’t give a fuck about ta norm, huh? So ya what juss toss that out the window and expect everyone ta follow your rulz? And when one breakz them they become disgusting, creeper, or slut in your eyez?” That seemed a bit arrogant on the other's part if that was the case, even more so if he expected people to just automatically know not to to do that. In any case, he would shake his head lightly as a bitter smile crossed his face. “We find it funny you flare up at us for doing somefink that shouldn’t have been a surprise to begin wiff. We never hid ta fact that we would play. In fact, we tink we were pretty obvious tat we were playful from the get go. We did mention layin’ down rulz before, buuh the conversation never went into depth with what sort of linez we were dealing wiff. We were quite blind to be fair and we did not go in expecting a calm reaction. In fact, we were expecting to meet ta floor, but we did it anyway juss to see how right or wrong we were. Yes, we played, but the assumption was you were on board since you said sure. We did not think for two seconds you were going to take that little nip as a personal or serious matter. You gave the signals that you were playin’, so we went along.” Was he that much in the wrong for doing what he did? Even more so when he had no clue of what sort of expectations the other played by or even what that sort of play meant to him? He was unsure, but even so he would continue on. “...As for biting your earb...web suppose it is sign were juss comfortable tryin’ it with ya. We dun juss pull those playz for the lolz on juss anybody. Tat iz a dangerous and dumb game honestly tat we don’t play. We prefer to play ta gamez wiff folk we are okay wiff. Though maybe we were a bit too bold or quick in our approach. I dunno….anymore.  you juss gave off the impressions that  you could’ve handled such a play, buhh then this happened, so here we are at each utters throats once more. As for your question….iz that how you view us now that the action is said and done? Do you view us as some player or distugusting slut?”

He wasn’t crying or exploding or even glaring daggers at this point. He was simply watching the other with a expression that suggested he was a troubled or confused by the matter and trying to figure it out. Mixed signals weren’t exactly grand to contend with even less so when you were unexpectedly bitten by things that was never brought up to begin with and in turn could’ve prevented such a clash. The blonde would remain quiet as he reached up to pinch his left ear between the cuff earring at the top and the feathered one he wore in his lower lobe as he continued to watch the other as he kept the emotional whirlwind inside under tight control as he simply waited to see what would happen now.

Well, no. Not like it’s hard to guess why though. ‘’Well, can’t really blame them though. If someone gets exposed to that early on, before they know you well in general, it could easily turn them off. There are so many people in the world nowadays that there is next to no reason to hold onto a specific one when they feel like a waste of time to you in any way. For most, it’s easier to just find someone they won’t have to dance around. Maybe they don’t all necessarily think bad of you or view you in a very negative light. They may just not be interested in hanging out with someone who behaves that way and solve the problem by not going ahead and getting themselves tangled in it to begin with.’’ That would probably never change, would it? There was no obligation for people to stay around those they didn’t find pleasant enough for their standards. Of course, if you walk away from almost everyone just because of petty stuff every time, then it’s not really okay in terms of behavior, but generally speaking, you do have the right to decide who you want to hang out with. Unless you actually actively make effort to put the person down somehow, then it’s not completely justified for them to complain that you aren’t bothering with them. It was never something you had to do, as sad as that fact may be.

And speaking of facts, the other wasn’t necessarily wrong about those kinds of reactions. In fact, he sort of had a blank face even now, if one were to classify it somehow. On the other hand, it wasn’t the only way, was it? ‘’Not necessarily. What I said was more of an example. Yes, some people may be harder to read in that department, but it’s not like I said it is the only way. If you can’t read their face, then you can look for other behaviors or even their words. Maybe I don’t react in a way you can see, but it isn’t as if I found it completely expected. I did question you on the subject after all. That’s the sole reason why the conversation even got to this point in the first place. If I wanted to just straight away file you under weird, I likely wouldn’t have bothered to even discuss the matter. Though, calling someone strange is probably relative anyway. I don’t think that being strange has to point only towards negativity. You can just be unusual not in a bad way, and it could still apply.’’ A lot of things can be strange or odd simply because they aren’t what you are normally used to seeing or dealing with. The words only become a negative label when you choose to use them that way. The question would be, how does one tell which way they are meant when one says them…?

Moving on though…eh? Well that was something he didn’t understand all too well. What is the big difference in the end? If you stay and pretty much do nothing, it’s almost the same as if you had chosen to leave the person to themselves. He would give the other a mildly confused look. ‘’What is the point of that though? If one stays and just doesn’t really do anything for real, it’s nearly the same as if they were gone. If it were me, I would find having someone sit next to me like a silent statue more awkward than anything else. I’d honestly rather they just leave in that case. It’s not too pleasant to be watched and stared at forever when you’re like that, and if they aren’t doing anything to outweigh that, why even be there?’’ In fact, wouldn’t it only be awkward for both sides? It’s not all that great to share the space with a weeping person either, and even less so when you find you can’t do anything for them anyway. Wouldn’t it just be better for them to be left with some alone time instead? Personally, he did not see company in such a situation to be very helpful, unless they at least had an idea about what they were trying to do there…..

He would just shrug. ‘’Would you rather talk about something else? It’s not like that conversation would have gone anywhere had that not happened, so I’d say it was better than nothing.’’ He had already stated his opinion on going out with people for drinks early on during it, so technically there had been nothing more to say, had the talk not switched to that. If nothing else, at least they had avoided a bit of unnecessary silence back there. It happened a lot even without this one adding to it…

…though maybe silence would actually be the better alternative sometimes. At least when considering situations like the one that happened next. This was honestly a pain. He didn’t want to fight. However, he did not want to get brushed off just because the other’s assumptions apparently said that it was meant to be okay. This wasn’t doing him good though…

‘’So? Even if I go and abstain from using any of those labels….do you really mean to tell me that someone going around and trying to get their hands into another’s pants within like an hour of meeting them or even less simply because they can is normal and completely ‘okay’? Excuse me, but I would beg to differ on that. I’m not saying I want anything to be a rule. But if you can’t keep your wandering hands to yourself and be decent enough, you’re the only one to blame when you get called things for it. What, am I supposed to encourage them and whatnot if I simply find it utterly distasteful to have some drunk hit on me consistently?’’ He wouldn’t have any of that. Since when is being a pig okay? He would feel no pity for someone if they landed themselves in a situation of being called a slut. It’s the consequence of their own actions, and not something you happen to do as an unintentional mistake. Is it because you’re too drunk to think normally? Well, who was the one who chugged so many drinks down without a care? Still only you. And don’t even try to say that you have no idea what all can happen when you’re badly drunk. Unless you want to imply you’re just really dumb instead, which is no win either.

Pausing for a bit, he would take a shaky breath. This wasn’t all too good. He honestly hated this. There was a good reason as to why he was generally far less reactive and emotional than the other, and him being somehow pushed to actually take that route was almost bound to not end very well. Still, turning away wasn’t an option at this point. ‘’…You know, I would sooner find it funny that you’re trying to look down on me for having my own opinion on what manners are acceptable while you yourself are doing the same damn thing. Why is it that you expect others to follow the same rules about games and plays as you do? You do realize that everyone’s borders on what falls within fair play are different, right? You can’t just assume it is not supposed to be a surprise to begin with, seeing as not everyone ‘plays’ the same way. If you really want to go that route, then automatically expecting me to view these games on the same wavelength as you is as unfair as me wanting others to follow my opinion. Don’t try to tell me I’m in the wrong for thinking one way when you’re sitting here basing what ‘should’ be fine on your own personal assumptions, which is arguably no better.’’ So what if it could be obvious that you’re being playful? It doesn’t mean the same thing to everyone, and what is play to one person can be offending to another. The fact that you don’t even take two seconds to consider the possible differences makes you impose your own rules on others just about the same way. Maybe a different subject, but the same outcome.

….and in the end, this wasn’t even really about that. ‘’Besides…’’ His gaze would flicker from one point to another for a bit, as if he was having trouble focusing on the other for some reason. ‘’…for all your attempts at explanation, you’ve kind of missed the point. I told you before. I would have thought you’d pick a less questionable kind of place OR not dance around and play it off if you stick to that. This isn’t even about not handling the action itself. I just despise being brushed off or being taken for granted. What is someone supposed to think when one pulls moves on them and then just waves it away like it was just a joke? Would you like having others approach you that way? Like someone going in and kissing you because they wanted to experiment and see how you react, and then goofing off about it, because ‘hey, I’m just fooling around man, it’s totally nothing, right’? Is that really the best way to handle things when you haven’t established a common ground for those things with the person before? Or would you rather me not taking you seriously with these things anymore because you wanna play, and then just laugh it off if you one day try to be serious with your advances because I wouldn’t have much reason to believe you aren’t just experimenting on me once again?’’ How are you supposed to trust their actions properly with that in the air? So what, should he just take anything like that as play by base, even if the blonde happens to try being serious later on? Would it be his fault then if he one day did not take the other seriously enough due to these attempts to pass off stuff like this as silly games? Wouldn’t be pleasant if that happened, would it, eh? Would Rika still be having fun then?

That said, it would appear that this clash was in fact having more of an effect on him than one would probably expect considering how he usually handled these matters. He was actually mildly shaking at this point, though it would be most noticeable only on his hands. Unlike it might have for the other however, this did not mean he was going to cry or such. It was something the blonde would have to figure out if he decided he wanted to know what was going on. There was one more thing to say though…

“We can seez tat for ta onez ya juss met,” the blonde would respond back, his tone a bit far away as he seemed to ponder that one. The man did have a point to a degree and maybe for a stranger what he said applied true and quite frankly Rika would not be surprised if someone walked away due to the onslaught of emotions or drama.... but then again, he wasn’t going to just break down and cry as easily before strangers either. No if he cried before someone, it was because he felt okay doing it. Trusted them in some regards not to be an ass or judge him about the matter. It was these sort of folk, the ones he had already begun to trust, that he wondered about at times. Wondered why they would simply walk away and did not stay when one needed them the most.... “Hmm. Ya tink that rule appliez to those tat say tere your friend only ta turn around and abandon ya as soon az yar negative side comez out?” Was that really because they didn’t want to be bothered? Or was that being a coward or ass about the matter? He had to wonder...If it was the former than why waste all that time building the lie in the first place? He understood there probably was no right or wrong answer to the matter, but even so he was curious to know what the other had to say on the matter.

However that went the conversation would flow into emotions in general and reading people. To what was said, the blonde would nod as he took the words into consideration. “So ya did,” the blonde would respond back to the strange portion of the conversation with a small smile. He remember the other poking him about his behavior, but he supposed until this people reading conversation began he hadn’t thought of what was being asked as a way of not easily swallowing that he was weird from the get go. He had missed that signal, but then again he was dealing with someone who was hard to read to begin with. "Anywayb, I say itz 50/50 for ta wordz and actionz tings to work. Tat personz in queztion could be lyin’ orb like you be hard ta read and in turnb could make one believe tere being analyze or a general discussion about a topic is being made. Eben so tis good stuff to know."

He wasn’t making an argument with his words as he pondered the matter out loud. He understood what the guy was saying and now thanks to this conversation had a different sort of tool to use when it came to at least trying to read the man with him. People reading was a difficult thing to do no matter which way you looked at it, but maybe this bit of insight would make that matter a bit easier. He couldn’t tell and wouldn’t be able to until he actually started putting said method in to play….something he began doing automatically shortly after this talk had passed, but no one would ever know since the blonde’s behavior remained the same.

That matter aside though, it seemed that people reading would come back to emotions or to be exact dealing with a someone who cries. While Rika was mostly quiet, his eyes would look back up at the other. He wasn’t sure if he could get the guy to understand fully what he wanted to say, but he would give him an answer anyway.

“Tere are timez when it is good ta leave one alone and tere are timez when it iz good ta stay. For uz it is mozly eazy ta figure out. We gibe clear signz when want anuber to leave uz be, buhh mozz of ta time we juss remove ourselves by walkin’ away. Make it eazy for uz both; howeber tere are timez whim we don’t give signalz and no amount of hugz or sweet talk iz gonna cure us. In fact...tat sort of stuff might make it worze; howeber, having someone tere to listen or juss sit with uz in thoze situationz speakz volumes to uz. Yes, it may seem like doing nuffin’, but juss being there and weathering it wiff us are signz of caring and much more than you can tink,” the blonde would say as he gave the other a gentle smile. Sometimes...what seemed like a useless act or trivial thing could have the most impact upon things. It all depend on how one took what was being done.

Speaking of trivial things, let’s go back to word games. To what was asked, the blonde would shake his head slightly as he gave the other a small lopsided grin. “Nah it'z cool. I dun have a problem wiff it. We can talk ‘bout whateber. Was juss sayin’ it waz somefink new, so not complaining. And ja. Ta topic waz better tan silence. Web sseem ta fall into thosbe alot. Heh.” Indeed silence was a common thing between them and now that he thought on it multiple waves of it had already passed between them.

Too bad then that any silence that followed after this was the conversation's equivalent to being the calm before the storm because what happened next was….far from pleasant and it seemed to get worse the deeper it went.

To the first set of words, Rika would keep his neutral expression and answer in a calm tone. “No we areb not suggestin’ tat at all. We do like ta play, but we habe a limb and wut yar referrin’ to is crossin’ it. We were makin’ sure we were clearb on wut ya meant by yar worbs. At firss it sounded az if ya were applyin’ it to eben…..” he wanted to say harmless, but pause a bit on that one. That might make him fly off the handle more. After a moment, he would continue.  “..play or somefink tat was not meant ta go that way.” Yeah, he could play, but most of his play was words and hands free. He was not lying when he said that the biggest part of why he did what he did was one because he was comfortable enough with the man to try it and two there had been opening there. Sure, he supposed he could be labeled a slut for what he did, but honestly if the man was going to just label him just for a small nip, then things would not be pretty. It wasn’t that he tossed the idea of it happening away, he just wanted to make sure what he thought the man was implying was not so. If he had been implying such things then words would be traded for sure....and of course not help matters here at all.

That aside though, the neutral expression on Rika’s face would change a bit as he took note of the shaky breath the other took. What was this? The guy was actually thoroughly upset about this? But...why? Rika didn’t quite understand what was happening here as his eyebrows furrowed slightly as he listened. A frown would cross his face.

“We are not tryin’ to force rulez upon ya. Or even sayin’ tat mah way is right and yars wrong. I waz tryin’ ta explaimb where web were comin’ from and alzo showin’ we weren’t hiding tat potential of clowning around wiff ya,” the blonde began as a small yet visible flare of agitation showed up for a few brief moments, but he surprisingly kept it under control as he shifted in his position so that his left arm was now resting on the table as he remained in his leaned position watching the other. “Ya say web iz bein’ unfair ta ya. A’right. Web admit we assumed we were playin’ by ta same rulez. We’ll give ya tat one and web apolgize for tat assumption. Shoulb stopped and considered tings a bit more instead of gettin’ wrapped up in ta moment; however, don’t tink web are lookin’ down on ya, tryin’ to force stuff on ya, or sayin’ yar wrong. We are juss tryin’ to talk here and figure diz out,” His tone was calm, but there was no hiding the fact that he was highly displeased with the matter. It was true words could be interpreted many ways….but if one was really trying to work something out, then that is why talk and clearing up things was there no? However, how well the chat worked depended on the other party and how much they would cling to their own stance. He honestly wanted to work this out, but it could only work if the other side was willing to let it happen.

Wherever that went though things would take an unexpected turn as Rika heard the next set of words. Instead of getting anger or even trying to defend himself on this front, Rika was at first quiet as he studied the other taking note of the way the other was behaving and also of the shaking hands.

...............

The blonde eyes would drift from the man’s hands to his face.

“Sharaku, look at uz,” Rika would say calmly to try and get the man to focus on him. He wasn’t sure what was going on with the other, but he rather not aggravate or escalate this either. If the other did focus on him, he would find the blonde’s expression serious still, but his eyes would be the main focus here. Eyes that held genuine concern there.“We understand where youb are comin’ from...and we were not tryin’ ta take you for granted. Honestly web thought the sarcasm was play until tis happenb. We didn’t know tat such a move meant somefink so seriouz to ya. Mah intention waz not to upset or suggests anyting outside of a playful nip to da ear. We weren’t brushin’ ya off honestly….and no we do not want ya start tinking that all mah advances would be play. In fact, if web were serious about tiz, we wouldn’t be drunk or in a bar for ta matter to try such a move for variouz reasonz. We didn’t mean ta upset ya, so we apologize for playin’ about. We do it again, k?” He would pause to let that settle in before continuing on. “But tell uz. Outside of what haz been stated, why haz tis shaken you so much?” His question was gentle and his behavior calm, but his eyes very concerned. He didn’t know what the hell he had triggered by that little nip, but if the other was actin’ this badly to it he much rather know what triggered it rather than potentially step on these sorts of mines again. The reaction was disturbing and he didn't like what he saw...Though the question left now was: Would Sharaku actually speak and help him understand this? Yeah, he understood from words where he had screwed up and took the notes to heart, but this reaction….was it really just about being brushed off or was there more this than the guy showed? He wanted to understand, but he couldn’t do that if the other remained quiet.

Outside of waiting to see what happened there, there was only one other thing to address, but this one seemed to be minor in comparison to what was happening now.  

“We know we can be slapped wiff negative tings, we just wanted to be clearb about what we’ve heard is all. Az for my intent and whyb we did it...well we’ve already stated tat one.”

Hm? Was there really that much of a difference there? The word ‘friend’ can have varying degrees of meaning to different people, right? Besides, no one says the bad stuff will come out right in the beginning, so some people may not realize what they have signed themselves up for until it’s a little too late. ‘’I’d say that it could? It depends on the person, and on how lenient they are when it comes to calling people friends. Someone might not give it much thought and state that you two are friends pretty early on, without knowing you all that well just yet and then realize it had not been the smartest decision once they get so see more of you later. Some people take friendship pretty lightly, and might declare it fast enough for misunderstandings like that to happen. So, I suppose it depends on what kind of person you are dealing with in that situation? And to be honest, if they do say they are your friend and then not even try once things go bad somehow…they either aren’t worth your time, or you might want to find out what being a friend means to them in the first place. It might turn out to be slightly different than what you have in mind yourself.’’ There are people who will call you a friend nilly-willy, in which case he could easily see it blowing up with time. Can you really say someone is your friend before you know them at least decently? Well sure you can, but at that point it would kind of only be a skin-deep label, and probably very easy to simply erase if it turns out to be inconvenient.

Maybe? Though, anyone can be a liar, regardless of how they behave. Might as well suspect everyone you speak with to possibly be lying then, which is not viable in the end. Being suspicious all over is not an answer either after all. He would kind of just half-shrug at the words given. ‘’So they could. But even when you think someone’s behavior is obvious or such, they can just be good at pretending to be genuine and in fact lying to you still. Unless you want to suspect everyone you speak with to be a possible liar, all you can really do is look for reasons to hope they are being truthful somehow. After all, you’d just look paranoid if you get leery about everyone all the time because what if they are just messing around with you.’’ You will never know anything for sure unless the person honestly tells you anyway….

Speaking of knowing things, the next talk wasn’t making much sense still. He didn’t see how it was good to have someone sit there and watch you as if you were some sightseeing exposition. Unless you were the kind of person that liked to have others see you being a baby, even when there was no real benefit to it in the end. He would raise an eyebrow. ‘’So you like having people watch you when you’re like that? What is the benefit of being exposition material when the person could just find other ways to let you know they care outside of just sitting there?’’ To be honest, it’s not something he’d be cheerful about doing, seeing as it’s hardly the only way, and it’s just uncomfortable. Not wanting to sit around awkwardly doesn’t mean you don’t care about the person, does it? The other way around, it would depend…but unless he knew the person well or they were very good at knowing how to handle such, he would in fact maybe even straight up tell them to just get out. It’s way less stressful that way.

‘’Well, I wouldn’t really mind the silence either. Sometimes it’s better than saying something random just to fill the void.’’ Besides, not everything is fun to talk about. He’d rather be quiet than to ramble about useless things and whatnot. Peace of mind sounds much better than having to focus on unnecessary information, and it wears you out a lot less in the long run.

…especially with how fast things can go downhill and create more and more tiring situations. He would frown slightly. Well now…that was pretty vague, wasn’t it? Maybe he did, maybe he didn’t. He wasn’t trying to distinguish between serious and play with that one. Just because you think you’re only playing, it doesn’t mean the receiver side is going to be comfortable with it and like it. Even something that you may think of as minor can easily come off highly unpleasant when pulled off wrongly. ‘’Not really, but I am not going to say it cannot be. If you pull something very similar, calling it play is not going to get you off the hook immediately. It’s only really play when both sides see the action done as such after all. I’d call what you refer to as possibly foolish unless you know what you are doing very well. Since even if you don’t mean for it to go that way, the person you’re dumping it on may not realize that at all.’’ You sure you want to just carelessly do that when so much can be misinterpreted? Shouldn’t be too surprised that it can also be taken as rather offensive in case you’re not dealing with someone who’s on the same page as you. Moving on from names and whatnot though…


You know, there was one thing he didn’t really get. How does this happen after all the talk that they have already had prior to it? Considering how they had a rather extensive conversation about how trying to read people and determining whether what you see is really what you think it is is hard some time ago, can one truly think that simply not trying to hide they are playing around will be enough to get their point across at all times? There are plenty people who do stuff like flirting in a playful manner even when they are ultimately serious about scoring with you in the end. And that’s just one example. He would pinch the bridge of his nose briefly. ‘’Seeing you say you want to figure this out, here’s food for thought for you. How much does it really say when you make it obvious you’re playing around? Don’t people often do that even when they are in fact trying to get somewhere? I would think most people don’t do stuff such as flirting in a completely serious, non-playful manner to begin with. Unless they want to come off as too stiff. How do you say one is meant to distinguish between true fooling around, and one done for the purpose of making the situation move along smoother?’’ Without any direct answers of course, seeing as in this case the one pulling it did not offer any explanation until it already escalated beyond a simple matter.

Speaking of escalating, things were certainly going places in more ways than one. While he would give the other a glance, he still didn’t seem overly keen on keeping his sight set in that direction permanently. For a moment, he’d have an odd, unreadable look on his face. ‘’I’m not…’’, he would mutter, eyes narrowing slightly as he’d grab onto the table slightly to keep himself still. Whatever that was about, he did seem mildly bothered when it came to being asked about what was going on, although not necessarily in a negative way. He would opt to respond eventually though, after a moment of thought. ‘’….that has nothing to really do with you or the things that happened specifically.’’ Well, it was related in a way, but probably not in the way the blonde may be assuming. Fact remained that it wasn’t exactly a direct result of the things that had been done, but more of an after effect of other stuff. Did the other really need to know about this right now? Who knew. He wasn’t all too keen on delving into the complexities at this point though, or anything related to this entire subject at hand for that matter.

In fact, he would end up leaning face forward down on the table, resting his forehead against his folded arms. Time out.

The blonde would consider the words quietly for a bit, his mind understanding what the other said, but at the same time not exactly agreeing fully with it. He understood that the other had given only one aspect of a much larger picture, but even so he found himself at odds with some of what he said. Even so, the most the blonde would show was a contemplative frown before he nodded a bit at the other. “Perhapss yar right, though we arb unsure how ta approach ‘n’ ask one what a friend means to them when they’ve walked away after calling meb such. It seems a bit of a moot ting ta do….” Maybe they didn’t necessarily hate them or something negative like that, but the fact remained when one left you alone in a moment where it was best for them to hold their ground, it left some rather confusing emotions about said person...and from there? Well things became even more uncertain than before. Friendship was a complicated thing, but maybe because he took the notion of being friends seriously it often baffled him when someone who claimed they were friends just abandoned him in the end. It was an odd aspect, but maybe it lined up with the other’s point on perception and what it meant to a person to be a friend. Maybe his idea of a friend didn’t match up with the others and so they fell out. Though.. He wouldn’t know since he never saw the need to actively seek out the answer to what went wrong. If he was betrayed or abandoned, the friendship was typically over for various reasons. Him and the offending party just never bothered interacting again, so no conversations about friends and what it meant to be one to each person involved was discussed. It might be helpful to discuss such things, but how many people would actually do that or even bother speaking to the one they betrayed or abandoned about their reasons? It wasn’t impossible, the blonde supposed, but it seemed a highly unlikely avenue for good results.

Friendship and its various meanings aside though, the blonde would blink as he heard the other’s next words. “Hmmm. We supposbes it workz boff wayz.” It honestly just depended. A wall was indeed hard to read, but one could indeed put on a show and make one believe things were great until something happened to rip down that curtain. Even so….”Though we tink, the showy are easier to figure out cause unlike wallz tat could juss blank face ya….showy eventually fallz in some fashion whether itz their own planning or a small trip ub tat reveals the truff. So web still stand tat the wall woult be harber to gauge tan the flashy omb. Eben so...actin’ paranoid iz no good eiber.” Wall or not people were a tricky bunch that you had to gamble with if you wanted to live a normal life per se and not become isolated. There were equal amounts of pain and joy out there that one had no choice, but to subject themselves to daily. Unless of course one wanted to be a recluse, paranoid, or other things that made one very isolated from everyone else and the world as a whole. He supposed everyone had that option, but why choose isolation and fear was beyond him and honestly didn’t make sense in the end.

...just as it seemed he wasn’t making any sense to the other when it came to the quiet comforting matter. To what was said, Rika would give the other a small smile. “Itz not az simple az juss sittin’ tere and starin’ at another. Quiet comfortin’ iz an act tat both participate in. Iz hard ta describe in wordz, but tat optionz is a sign ob caring for us and at timez doez tat trick better tan other methodz. Not sayin’ other possibilitiez canna work tho juss sayin’ sometimez juss being there is better. Web love ta demonstrate, buhh without ta emotionz tere, we are not sure how effective it would be. Regardlezz itss somefink to keep in mind, ezpecially if ya plan to hang around uz in ta future.” He couldn’t tell if the other would stay around long or not, but he knew the more the guy hung around the more likely he was going to wind up dealing with the crying and in turn would have to find ways of dealing with it unless of course he just walked away. Either way, he had a tool to consider when it came to tackling the emtional mess Rika could be...though in the end it was the other's choice to absorb the information and in turn find it useful or not.

That aside, Rika would nod in agreement with the next statement. “Tis true,” he would say his attitude pleasant for the moment as they did indeed fall into a silence for a bit; however, pleasant fields would be quickly swapped for angry seas and jagged rocks as the conversation dove into a space that was not so pleasant.

To what he heard first, he honestly wanted to roll his eyes at how the other seemed to echo what he had been trying to explain the moment this whole thing started. Yes, he understood that they needed to be on the same page and that both parties needed to consider it play to be play….thus why he had done what he did assuming the other was on a play page like him, but for some reason that was lost in transition since it was brought back up again now? He wasn’t even sure anymore. Was he simply not making sense, the other not listening, or was his explaining just that horrible? The fact that he was hearing his words again in another fashion and a repeat of a point he had understood for a while now caused the blonde to feel rather irritable, but instead of actin’gout, he would only slump a bit in his seat as he looked over to the side a bit moody as he drummed the table with well polished nails. “Yeah, yeah...we know…” he would mumble not exactly angry at the other, but still a bit irked by the whole matter circling like that. seriously...how did this happen?

He understood quite well by now his action was an error and that they weren’t on the same page as each other. He had taken a chance expecting either good or bad results. It was the nature of the game, but it seemed no matter how much he tried to express that the other didn’t want to give the playing field or what had led up to this particular situation any consideration. Maybe he was simply not thinking clearly due to emotions going through him or something, but it seemed the other was very set on his own view making the sight of some sort of resolve quite hard to see when he felt like he was scratching at a wall here. Yes, the guy listened to somethings, but did he listen to the whole matter and consider it? The blonde couldn't tell from the feed back given...which in turn was beginning to sound like a lecture because clearly he was fully wrong? Argh! The more he thought about it the more frustrating trying to figure it out became, so remaining quiet and looking away from the other a while longer, he would bite his lip a bit as he shook his lightly. He just….need to calm down probably…..He might be translating this all wrong so…

The annoyance and calming process only took a few seconds before golden eyes would drift back over to the other who had fallen silent at something the blond had said. When the other did eventually speak, Rika’s left eye would narrow a bit as he quietly considered the other as he drummed the table in a slow thoughtful matter rather than an agitated one.

“A’rite, Sob ya habe somefink tere. We suppoze flirtin’ iz a playful gambe in ta end; howeber….web weren’t tryin’ to go anywherez wiff ta nip. We waz playin’ wiff ta parameterz tat had been set up from jokez and whab not that, at leass from mah standpoint, waz not in dah same boat az flirtin’.....” He would trail off there as he simply watched the other quite miffed with his counterin’. Sure it was a conversation and discussion per se, but what did the guy want? He poked and poked at things making it feel like in the end no matter how much he tried to explain what happened or talked, the blonde was the bad guy here and so in the wrong. He didn’t get it...and in turn was becoming highly frustrated with the confusing matter. Being drunk….and having the other begin to break down in some fashion only made the situation even worse.

It seemed that whatever was going on internally with the guy was only made worse by the pry from earlier. Out of discomfort, the blonde visibly winced as he watched the other grasp the table and make his short answers. Naturally he wanted to pry more, but when the other decided to place his head down and in turn mutter those last words the blonde found himself in a very odd position as confusion overload kicked in.

He couldn’t pry because well the guy didn’t seem to want that and he didn’t exactly want to escalate something if he attempted to do something like rub him on the back or something. Lord knows, he did not want anymore eruptions to come from misinterpretations….So what was he to do? The other didn’t seem to want to speak on the matters bothering him and he couldn’t comfort in a way he knew how to, so what now? Did he just sit and do nothing? The blonde would stare at the downed man for a bit and then shaking his head quietly blink a bit using every bit of will power to keep those tears of frustration in check as he look off to the left.

“A’rite…” he would say in a quiet and drained fashion before becoming falling and focusing on something else in the bar as he unconsciously began to bite at his thumb nail, his mind lost in a messy whirl of emotions he didn’t quite know what to do do with at the moment...

Eh? He would raise an eyebrow briefly at the answer he was given. ‘’I don’t know. You just do it? That’s how you get answers to anything, don’t you? Anything could seem like a moot point, but is it really? Just a moment ago, you were saying that poking an upset person is worth it, while it could also be said that it may be a moot gamble to take. But who is really right in the end…?’’ Probably no one. However, if one type of approach is good, why would something similar be moot instead then? Either of those situations had chances to become failures, so it’s not like it could truly be based on likelihood. Things are only really moot when you convince yourself they are. Then again, guess that happens pretty often, doesn’t it….?

And well….does that even matter too much? One trip up probably doesn’t tell you enough. It can make you suspect, but it may also mean nothing significant in the end, putting you back at square one, or making you distrust a person unnecessarily. Maybe it’s better to not even try to read people beyond basic impressions? Who knows. He would shrug lightly after a moment of thought. ‘’I guess it’s just about the same in the end. All of us have moments when we don’t think the nicest things about a certain person, so perhaps one can’t trust what they see anyway. No one is going to put you on a pedestal forever, even if they like you in general…’’ Putting up with both the good and the bad is a part of it, right? As long as it doesn’t get too bad, of course, since that is the whole point of watching out for possible leading on. In the end though, maybe you can never know 100%, regardless of what angle of view you attempt to consider.

‘’I don’t know….’’ It just didn’t click, and probably wouldn’t anytime soon. His view of effectiveness when it came to attempts at comfort maybe wasn’t what was most typical. Then again, he wouldn’t even know. Not like he spoke about that subject with people right and left, or had to participate in such situations often. In fact, he didn’t even remember ever having to really deal with someone crying. Not in a direct manner where he would be the only one available for the job or the like. He didn’t seek such situations either, so it would really have to be bad luck for him to land himself into anything like that. He was generally not the person people should want to come to unless they wanted a matter-of-fact solution to a problem of theirs. If they just wanted to bawl around company, it would get awkward pretty fast….

Regardless of little differences, bigger ones would come up past a bout of silence. And then a little more silence would proceed to follow as the other saw it fit to only answer with a mumble that didn’t quite lead anywhere concrete. At that moment though, he would opt to hold back and say nothing in return, simply casting a mild frown at the blonde for a moment. Whatever was going through his head at that point would remain sitting there for a while longer. Likely, he would bring it up eventually though, so not like the other had to worry about being left out completely. It was probably for the better to leave it for when he was calmer anyway.

He would shake his head a bit. ‘’Not quite what I meant there. I’m simply asking how would you say one is supposed to distinguish between those two. Since in the end, does it really change anything that you had a certain standpoint when another person may not have the same one? If they do not know your way of perceiving parameters beforehand, how would you say they should figure out where you are trying to go and where you aren’t? Assuming you don’t want things to end up even worse than this has, they should technically be able to tell before it blows, no?’’ While it’s nice to keep saying that you did not mean it that way, does that remedy anything in the long run? So you don’t mean it now, but what does that information truly say? This could easily end up happening again in a slightly different scenario, and always leaving it up to stating you had a different idea after it goes wrong would get tiring eventually. You may be sorry, and repeat that an infinite amount of times, but is there something to do to make more sure that such will not happen again as effortlessly as it had this time? He honestly just wanted to know how exactly the blonde wanted to achieve resolution…not only hear apologies and repeats of he did it because he thought it was game as if that was the ultimate answer to the general problem at hand. They both already knew that one at this point, and would that actually help in avoiding having this kind of thing happen again?

Regardless of where that went though, things would eventually crumble down a bit. Which perhaps wouldn’t even have been too bad, though, when do things actually go the best possible way? At first, nothing would happen, so the blonde would be left to his self-reflections for a small while. Despite the silence though, he would shift a bit to rest his chin on his hands and stare ahead instead of down at the table. For a small amount of time, it would seem like he was absentmindedly thinking about something and not really paying attention to the surroundings, but he would eventually glance at the blonde from the corner of his eyes, although not moving from his position. ‘’Tell me. Is being a mess and almost breaking apart your typical reaction to conflict? The way you ‘play’ strikes me as rather confusing. How is it that you’re so careless and bold when you’re fooling around, but turn into this when you get faced with something more serious? If you have the guts to risk getting punched for your moves, why do you hold back and get fussy when there’s a different risk to face? I can tell that something is bothering you about this conversation, but if you’re just going to suck on your thumbs instead of facing it head on and actually telling me you have a problem and what it is, I can’t really do much about it. Cat got your playful tongue all of a sudden?’’ He was really curious as to what the reasons behind this switching around was. He wasn’t attempting to fight over it though, as his tone was in fact mildly weary and he wasn’t even trying pick himself up from the table just yet.



You can’t be both extra brave and the guy to seek escape first at the same time. And if you really need to, at least not flip several times in a short span of time? It can be rather taxing on both sides to untangle the confusing scenarios even without that kind of thing being involved….

"You juss...do…" The blonde would give the other a few blinks as he tried to process what had been said, a small frown coming across his face as he did so. “In a general senss tey seemb ta samb, but underneaf itz not ta sameb sorta gamble. If yar risking a bite or so with an emozional person yar sstill invested in tem, but betrayal? Betrayal ya pretty much cut tiez right ten and tere. While itz true no one is right or wrong per se whimb lookin’ at the surfacez, tell uz why should web evemb try to bother with someomb tat haz stabbed uz onze already? Eben wiff reasonsss there, doez tat make it a’rite again?” It was true the gamble aspect was there in many cases, but to say it was an equal gamble when you’ve already been stabbed once? He did not see this as the same, but even so the expression he wore was rather calm as he tilted his head curiously at the other. Was handling the betrayal really like handling an emotional person? He thought not, but he would let the other speak if he so choose to do so.

Well outside of that confusing matter at least the next few were easier to contend with. To the first set of words, Rika would give a light hum as he unconsciously rubbed his ear being careful not to pull the jewelry there. “Tat may be true,” he would say in thoughtful tones. In the end, you could never be 100% sure of anything. So maybe the trip up was just a minor misstep and maybe it was best to keep an open mind until something truly prove the other could not be trusted. It was certainly the less stressful path, but right? He honestly wasn’t sure, but it was something interesting to think about nonetheless when it came to people and how to handle them in general.

Speaking of handling, it looked like the other still wasn’t getting the whole quiet support thing. To his words, the blonde would give a light chuckle as he shook his head. “Itz fimb.” Honestly the more one tried to explain the matter, the more confusing it got. One wouldn’t understand unless one was placed in a situation where said method could be used. So instead of trying to explain it more, he would let the topic float by itself unless it decided to come back to the front again. Regardless of where that went, waters would start to get a bit more choppier than before as emotions began to flare.

To his short answer, he noticed the look the other gave him and for a few brief moments narrowed his eyes sligtly at the other as he expected some form of lashing out; however, when the other choose to stay silent instead, the blonde had to wonder if the man would actually let whatever thought was on his mind go, so easily. It was hard to say and with issues bigger than that before him, the blonde would give the passing thought a few seconds of his time before he was pushing that to the back burner and was focusing on what was being said next.

He would scratch his head as he gave the other a frown of confusion as he thought. “Wellb ya can’t….unless ya set ta rulze beforehand. If ya want ta not be surprised, ten we needz ta talk tis point out, so we are clearb on tings and how we veiw wha. Utterwise it will be a buger mess tan tis.” He honestly didn’t know what the guy was getting at with this, but instead of trying to explain a point that was quite dead at this point, he would try to approach this one from a different point of view. Though how well this worked time would tell. However, perhaps it would work better than what was unfolding now.

While the silence was there, the blonde was heavily debating his options here as he bit his thumbnail as he watched the crowds, trying to find some solution to this problem that wouldn’t escalate it even more. His expression was distressed and honestly it could seem like he might just cry as he continued to think the matter over...for one second too long. It seemed that trying not to do anything to upset the matter and thinking it through, did exactly what he feared a more active move would do...it made the situation worse.

As the other spoke, the blonde would look back over at him, his expression going from calm to a tormented as he took in the words. It would take him a moment, but eventually he spoke. “Risks are eazier to take whimb yar on a field yar comfortable wiff….We camb be bold cauze in ta end play izn’t meant to be taken so seriouz tat it ends up like tis...." He would shake his head before letting out a shaky sigh trying to keep his voice calm despite the clashing emotions within.  “We weren’t sucking our thumbz, we were tinking of how to approach tis. Mah instinct was to comfort via touch, buh after that whole ear nipping ting we didn’t tink it wise to do that. We thought the whole point of tat conversation waz not to be so bold and to tink before we act, but ten when we try to ta do tat ya throw mah own wordz back at uz and make remarkz at us like we are some type of hypocrite. Yeah, we gave ya the quiet comfort method earlier and perhapz it coulb habe been used here. Maybe in time we'b juss said screw and did juss what we spoke of, buh instead we get bitten for not actin' and tinkin'. Maybe it servez us right for overtinking it." Maybe he should just not think and go with instinct then cause apparently thinking was the wrong way to do things to? He just didn't know anymore. On the note of not knowing. Here was another.  "Youb ax uz ta face tings head on...yet juss a few seconds ago you gave the impression you didn’t want to be bothered with a topic that was upsetting you. Az for my flipping and flopping...well tat is unfortuantely how web are. Web camb calm, but when driven into corners like tis wiff no way of figuring out if whatever we are doing is right or not? Yeah, we do break and want to cry. Itz like being in a box made of concrete wiff wallz just closing up on ya. It’s suffocating…and it hurts all ober...and yeah we know u are probably hurting too, but we honestly don’t know how to make tis better. Every ting up to we do seems to juss make it worse. Az for what bothers us itz ta hold ting. We juss...don't know wha ta do anymorb..." he would bow his head at that point and trail off unable to speak any further thanks to the emotions there. He wan't crying thankfully, but he was trembling a bit more than usual, a sign he was indeed upset, but even so....Even if he was this emotional mess he was honestly trying here. He just wondered if the other would understand he was giving his all and not just assume the mess he was meant he was weak and couldn't handle stuff.

He couldn't be a rock....and if the other had doubts about what he was well then...he was getting the full course of exactly what this creature was. There were no lies or tricks here to hide anything here. Rika was simply being himself...even if it wasn't his best self at the moment.

Since when were they talking about stabbing? The whole point was to figure out why someone would choose to walk away after originally saying they are your friend, right? No one was implying that they did some major betrayal outside of kind of just leaving you be. Is it really that huge of a deal? Considering that you technically have no idea why exactly they decided to not pursue the friendship further. It would be different if they first shamed you to oblivion or were extra nasty to you and then left...but such has not been mentioned in this conversation, has it? He would give Rika a somewhat odd glance. ‘’…say what now? I assume that if you have no idea why they decided to break things off, they just did it without telling you much. In which case, they could have various reasons for deciding to not pursue said friendship further. Is it really worthy of being called a betrayal at that point? I can see that being a thing more easily if they made a point of cursing you out or being very unpleasant to you before cutting it off, in which case you would probably have a good idea why it happened without needing to ask them further. Of course, it’s not nice to just leave someone…but I would not see it in terms of ‘being stabbed’ unless they do something more harmful to warrant that. Friendships tend to come and go, aside from the few true ones that stick to you for the rest of your time. Sounds like a bit of an overkill to me to point the betrayal fingers at everyone who decides to look elsewhere unless they truly deserve that treatment. So, I say it can be alright to go ahead and seek answers. It depends on the situation and how it all happened in the first place. In my opinion, at least.’’ And even if they spoke of betrayal…it isn’t always absolute, is it? There is always the option to forgive a person for something they’ve done, if they show they are willing to amend for it somehow.

He would half shrug afterwards though. ‘’Investment varies from person to person regardless. We all see connections through a different set of invisible glasses. I could say that sometimes I might risk dealing with an emotional person without feeling particularly invested in them just because I think I could handle it and I’m already there anyway. Am I wrong for doing that? Who knows. All of these rules about socialization are man-made in the first place. They’re not ultimate either. Therefore, to each their own, which is the main reason I’d say that it may sometimes be worth it to seek an explanation beyond what you yourself may assume.’’ You may learn something interesting by doing that too. Not that it’s always easy, of course, but it is a good thing to keep in mind if you can. That one person may not even realize that you see what they did as betrayal. Or be on the same page as you when it comes to emotional situations of any sort. People can be pretty complex, which makes it both intriguing…and a pain in the ass, occasionally.

That said, the next few topics would blow out into nothingness slowly, with the responses getting too short to support any further continuation. And it probably wasn’t necessary either way, as there wasn’t much left to say on either of them at that point. Not until something sparked further discussion in those areas.

Which probably wouldn’t happen for a long while, as very different back and forths would take stage not long after. ‘’Well, that certainly does sound like a better idea…’’ Though, he wouldn’t really push at it much more, seeing as the other was being confused anyway, and the current moment was likely not the best kind of stage for going deep into that. Or so it appeared, at least. If they were going to talk about such stuff, it would be better when both of them are calm and whatnot, which did not seem to be the case at the given moment.

…come on, though. Was this guy capable of anything except getting more upset each and every time? Frankly, he was not sure what the blonde was expecting out of this in the first place. Dealing with issues naturally meant the less nice things would be brought up, no? If you’re going to just turn into negative gooey mess because you take everything as if it was a personal attack on yourself or such, what can really be solved in the end? It’s not like things will be solved with a snap of fingers, so a prolonged convo about a problem doesn’t have to mean you’re making things worse all the time just because it hasn’t flipped to nice stuff yet. In all honesty, dealing with a constantly worsening sniffly face just because things weren’t immediately working out and turning towards the better was more of a pain than anything else in this situation. Like…what was he supposed to do…? Give the other tissues and just give up on the whole matter cause somehow the other side is suddenly more upset over it all even though the original problem started somewhere completely else? Just…how. This was completely backwards.

At this point, he was honestly speechless just because of how ridiculous this was getting. Like..he had been bothered about what happened at the start of it all, but not nearly as much as this guy seemed to break apart over the fact that he wasn’t able to be comfortably in the right after a few exchanges. What would be next, existential moments over someone giving you a wrong look, because of all the bad things it could mean?

He would sigh, closing his eyes for a moment before moving back into a sitting position and glancing at the other.

‘’Look…you honestly need to take a few deep breaths here and stop flipping out over everything as if it was the end of the world like we know it. I have no idea what do you expect of me here, but dealing with something that can be an issue obviously means that compliments aren’t the things that will be thrown around. Just because negative points are brought up, it doesn’t mean that talking about them for an extended period of time automatically means you are making things worse all the time, or being spoken to with the intention to constantly bite. What should I even do? Try to compose my words into a poem for you so that it sounds ‘nicer’ to you and doesn’t make you always assume the worst ever from it? Even though we aren’t talking about a nice thing in the first place, and doing that would technically just be a lie?’’ Plus, too much sugarcoating can take away the value of what is being said instead, and make it seem like it’s no big matter anyway. Which…is not the best, is it? If you go out of your way to bring a problem up, you likely do not want it to turn into a joke matter, right?



He would shake his head slightly. ‘’Speaking of perceptions…I’m not. I wasn’t really upset over the topic much. I just wanted a moment to take a breath, is all. Plus, I think cutting that back and forth short was probably the better decision over letting it go around in circles forever with nothing getting really solved there. Besides…somehow you are the one being more upset and all over the place over this all, so I figured there wasn’t really a point in focusing on me at that point. I’m not even all that hurt. It’s like…when you prick yourself with something sharp for example…sure, it hurts quite a bit at first, and is pretty annoying, but as long as it isn’t some deep wound, the worst doesn’t last very long. I don’t choose to lament over it forever or stew in the pain longer than I must. I’m not exactly a glutton for self-punishment. I’m just trying to talk about things and figure what is going on at this point, but I’m kind of drawing a blank with you only getting more and more upset with everything that is brought up. I spoke about the flopping because it was confusing me…not because I wanted to deliberately put you down as you love to assume about my words most of the time.…’’

He just…had no idea what was he supposed to do here anymore. Suddenly being cheerful and nice would be out of place in a situation that is primarily about cracking an issue open, but nothing else was working out….? He wasn’t trying to overthink on this, but whether he did or not, the result seemed to be just about the same for him, apparently.

“No. It would nob be betrayal automatikly for minor tingz. We understamb, stuff like tat happenz  amb perhapz talkin’ can save ya in ta end...Eben if ya abadon anuffer at a bad moment. Juss neber happened to uz. Alwayz was juss left behind and tat was tat,” he would fold his arms as he sat back in his chair, his index finger coming up to his lips to tap them as he continued. “Web neber saw a reasonz ta approach again or ax questionz, eben less so whimb ta other party iz like nope ebery time tey see ya. Betryal….ya say itz overkill to label tingz at such, buh we tink that this word camb apply ta tingz like abandonment, or a perzon shutting ya out wiff no explanazion. We wiss web could see it as a matter ob seek out ta answer, find ta truff, buh it iz not tat simply whimb someone suddenly makez ya not trust tem anymore. We aren’t sayin’ tings are absolute, buh little bitez can be juss as dangerouz as a larger one.” That was the whole point of bringing up stabbing and betrayal in the first place. He wasn’t saying label all the issues as betrayal, but rather the ones that still rocked the boat no matter how trivial it is. Those heavier issues were the ones he was aiming for when it came to betrayals and stabbings…

Regardless of the differences in view, the blonde didn’t seem upset or trying to make a fuss out of the matter as he observed the other for a bit more finding it interesting that no matter what was presented, the man always left it opened to what ifs and choices. He even gave a rather solid point on why one should pursue answers rather than assume. To what he said the blonde would blink as he let his hand dropped to his arm. “If it only ta majority thought tat way,” he would say with a small smile and a shake of his head. What the guy said had some valid points, but when applied to reality it didn’t make a very big splash. Sure there may be one or two people that would follow this open minded path, but the majority? He thought not. Most assumed things and just remained in their boxes living with the assumptions and never going out to seek the true answers... And he had to say in most cases, he was the same. Now could he break the bad habit that society placed within him? Maybe, but the conditioning was going to take a while to undo if he even wanted it undid at all.

Despite the way, they differed here in some aspects, the blonde did take the point of view in well enough as he locked away the knowledge in some compartment of his brain before moving on to mostly silence? Well, it certainly seemed that way as topics died off and the last one actually got a rather good end result as the other agreed talking out the rules and what not was the better option in the end. Maybe he was still confused or maybe he was just relieved that no further argument came from this, but the blonde would give a calm nod back to the other as he spoke. “Letz conssiber it somefink ta work ten.” From there, he would let the subject drop or do whatever it was going to do. There was no point pushing for another deep conversation and potential blow outs due to differences just yet. One did need to take a breather from such matters and just come back to it once everyone had picked themselves up again and could think in calmer ways.

...Ways that didn’t seem to be applying at all to the final situation which seemed to be a roller coaster ride of misunderstandings and what not. A ride that just simply derailed once Rika expressed and showed how he felt. As soon as he did this, he already knew what the other was probably thinking. It was what anyone would think when faced with such a situation. "This guy is weak and whiny. He can’t handle the tough situations and only seeks to wallow in self pity and punish himself with whatever is happening because apparently it whatever is said is personal attack." In an nutshell, he was probably viewed as an over-sensitive cry baby...yet that was so far from the truth it was sad. Yes he displayed the behaviors and on some level he was hurting, but it wasn’t from what was being presented to him, but rather internal self-loathing and other issues he had coming into play. He knew how this would look and sound, but he honestly knew no other way to express the matter instead of in a negative light like he had done for years when things got ugly. Heh...maybe this was why no one stuck around. Didn’t want to stick around a ball of negativity now did they?

That is why when he heard the words that came, he didn’t react negatively to them. In fact, he was calm as he got almost exactly what he expected. The internal self-hate only intensifying since he knew he was the problem in an otherwise normal conversation. Even so, he managed to keep it buried within, but the mental toll was beginning to show. His body seeming to become more and more slumped and his expression more drained.

To what he heard, he would look over at the other tiredly. “........” First silence as the emotions kept his lips sealed for a bit, but wait now. Give him a tick. He would take a breath in and let it out slowly, the trembling still there, but less so. “...Don’t…Don’t paint pretty pictures for uz….Don’t speak kindly or sweet...Tat sort of stuff iz actually gonna make tis situations worbse az it will only fellb like ya mocking me or belittling us in some way…Web understand tis playin’ field iz not nice…Didn't expect it ta be.....” He would pause and actually flinch at that next set of words, but somehow he found his voice and spoke. “...Yes….we probably do bring it upon ourselvez unintentionally by displaying or sayin’ how we feel...We are...highly aware what dis looks like, buhh dun know how to see it as anything, buh negative. Yes, yes, we can try to turn it around and what not, buh honestly we have tried tat to in the past, an'it doezn’t work...Howeber, it doesn’t matter. It probably soundz more like excuzez ta do what we do...So in nutshell juss….ignore our behavior...we arb gonna cry and say tingz, buhh...it honestly haz nuffin’ ta do wiff what is being said or address. Web can continue on sinze you haven’t done anyting to warrant running away or being upset about it in ta normal sense….”

It honestly wasn’t the matter at hand, but internal things that caused this. Perhaps he just need professional help about it and just was too scared or in denial about it. He honestly was unsure there, but he was aware that what he did was not normal and while the other did question the matter, he honestly could not simply stop and find the happy lining. Sure he could on some days and maybe even seem to do well, but always the negativity came back and in turn made the world bleak again. It was a complicated matter that he was not very good at explaining….and honestly wondered if it was a good thing to talk about with this guy. He didn’t want the other to feel the need to try and pick it apart or act as some form of therapist...In fact, that would be the worse thing that could happen right now. Just no….He didn’t need pitying or babying, but he didn’t need lashing or sarcasm either. It was a complicated mess that in the end only he could probably unravel, if he bucked up enough courage to face that side of him head on.

The blonde would sigh a bit as he laid his head down on his arms feeling physically beat up and mentally drained. He hated this aspect of himself with a passion...and yet it would stay until fixed. He didn’t expect others to fix for him or even try to. He honestly had to do it alone. Even so...that did not change the fact that the other would have to contend with this mess head on if he wished to continue to interact with the blonde….

His mood seemed to remain low and perhaps it reached an even lower point internally with the next passage of words; however, instead of crying or anything like that, the blonde did something else as he pushed himself up into a sitting position. He would actually give the other a smile.

“We are glad you have stayed this long and even shared some insight on yourself with us. We wish we could be more clear, buh...unfortunately we dunno tink we will become any less confusin' anytime soon. Flipping and flopping in mood and behavior and iz juss part of my nature,” he would shift in his spot and get to his feet. He would wobble a bit, but manage not to fall. With his balance more or less in place he would drift over to the other and pause for a moment to invade his personal space once more to place a kiss on his forehead if the other allowed it.

If allowed the other would find this move very different than the bite. This was not play or something done simply because the blonde was drunk. It was a natural move that the blonde performed around those that he was comfortable with that could hold various meanings. In this situation, it was his way of apologizing…

Still slightly in the other's space bubble, the blonde would continue to smile, but his eyes remained sad.

“Perhapz coming back to tis when we are calmer iz bess..we apologize for wasting your time and ruffling feathers tonight. We have made quite a mess and we fear if we continue on...tis will only end in a place tat maybe it should not be...Tis walking away….iz not because of you...Itz juss bess for now...”

He would say the words gently enough; however, the blonde wouldn’t linger too much longer as he straightened up and made his way first to the counter to pay for the drinks and then once that was done, he would drift through the crowds and head outside. He needed some air and to get out of there before something worse happened. Back out in the night air, he would take to drifing at an unhurried pace back towards his home with only his messy thoughts to keep him company....

Mama!:

Ehhh, no. He didn’t care enough to think that way. If it was a person that did it fairly quickly, without having been said ‘friends’ for a decent amount of time, he wouldn’t bother griping about it and calling the person a traitor and whatnot. He wouldn’t even see a person as a friend that fast. They can claim to be anything they want, but that did not mean he would accept it right away. Unless it’s a long-term friend pulling that stuff…he probably didn’t even trust them much yet in the first place. No real change there. He would just offer a nonchalant shrug. ‘’Then I guess you can say that I don’t care enough to swim around in hurt feelings when it isn’t something that already mattered to me greatly. If it’s someone who claimed to be my friend early on and then left soon after…I probably didn’t even trust them much to begin with. I’m not going to see someone as a real friend until they prove it to me. There’s no reason to get attached to people too fast. In lieu of that, I have no reason to label someone turning around as betrayal, for if they turn tail that fast, they have likely never earned a reason to mean anything special to me in the first place. I would want to ask them simply to know. Not really because I’m hoping to get them back somehow. If that happens as a side effect, then it’s only a nice plus for the effort.’’ It can be a real annoyance, that’s for sure, but to think of that person as a traitor of sorts? They would first have to get close to him and then pull shit for him to feel genuinely hurt by the move. Otherwise, he would likely just shrug it off. Do whatever you want man, I’m not keeping you on a leash here.

‘’I prefer to not be too dramatic about these things. To be honest, just because I may hang around someone I’ve met to see whether it will work or not, I don’t think I should also feel obliged to stay around permanently because leaving may hurt them. Or anything like that. Unless I’ve like..sworn to be their best friend already or something as heavy as that…I just wonder what level of commitment are they even expecting so early on? Of course I could want to just leave if I find out something that I can’t stand about them no matter what. Sometimes it’s simply better to do that instead of staying around and draining yourself forever in hopes it will get better when it seems like it probably won’t. There are so many people around you that you could make better friends with as well. No need to waste way too much effort and energy on someone you can just tell won’t be a good match for you. You want to puff up and call what I did betrayal behind my back simply because you don’t know why exactly I did it, but won’t really try to find the reason first if it bothers you that much? I suppose good riddance then? I frankly never liked people who would point fingers at me because I did something without taking the painstaking time to explain myself, while they never bothered to ask me in case I had a reason for not going ahead before they stuck labels onto me right away. Not unless I have already invested enough time in them for it to be automatically warranted. If you come to me because the matter really means so much to you, I will tell you what you need to know. But if I had to compose lengthy explanations to everyone I’ve ever known and didn’t stick around forever as a precaution, I would probably grow gray hair pretty fast.’’ That would be pure insanity. In all honesty though, he never really made promises to begin with. Perhaps the problem was that a lot of people saw the friend label way too lightly nowadays. You not completely sure you want to stay by a person yet? Then don’t call yourself their friend before you are. Then you won’t have to look like a jerk when you change your mind soon after. It’s as simple as that. While the other side shouldn’t expect a lot from a friendship that haven’t had enough chance to prove itself yet. Things would be much easier if people were less touchy over things at times. You can get along with a person and have a good time without getting too attached to them right away, no?

None of them had the obligation to stick around through everything, right? Not every so called friend will be a friend until the end. That’s how things are. He could see himself just slamming the door on someone if they really turned him off by their actions somehow. Would it be wrong of him to decide to not want to go further anymore? Perhaps it was just him, but he didn’t invest his feelings into people too fast, and thus didn’t see such stuff as a matter to flail about until it became truly serious. What’s a bite unless it’s done in a way so it truly hurts bad? That said….’’That’s on them. I’m going to do things my way regardless of what the majority chooses to think.’’ If it always came down to what the majority does and thinks, nothing would ever change anywhere, for no one would try to go outside the box that had originally been created.

Moving onto different matters and issues though, at least one of them would end on a decently good note. If one could call it that. Maybe? It was certainly better than the other possibilities that came to mind. ‘’Right.’’ He was in no mood to continuously argue that one anyway. They were already going in circles enough after all. And it would seemingly get even worse than it originally was, which was something he’d in fact call a major accomplishment. Not it a good way that is, but one nevertheless.

….he just didn’t get what the hell the guy wanted from him? So no nice words…but then, if he spoke in a direct way, wouldn’t that just generate more upset anyway? All in all, was he to assume that nothing was going to be at least a somewhat good choice of action here? Frankly, he was rather bemused at this point. He would frown lightly, crossing his arms over his chest. ‘’So…bringing up negative things is no good, nice words are no good…and considering that if I try to ignore your current acting, there is nothing to pay attention to…you do realize that you’re basically asking me to just ignore your entire existence right now? Is that what you want? That said, I find it rather contradictory of you to say that it has nothing to do with what is said, when you’re also pointing out how this seems like biting, that sounds like mocking....well, anything I say is somehow a trigger? How is that unrelated to it then? Doesn’t come across to me that way. I don’t understand what do you want. Continue on…how, when I’m pretty much being told I can’t in fact say or do anything for real, because it’s just no good period? It only sounds like you want me to shut up and not try anything anymore, otherwise you’ll break into tiny pieces for one reason or another.’’ Like, what? Should he just up and leave? One thing only makes it worse, another you’re not supposed to do, and oh, ignore this too. What does that leave? Pretty much….nothing? Unless he wanted to start pulling out magic tools and whatnot, which he obviously did not have.

Either way, he was not happy about this, and that wouldn’t change easily. Yeah sure, because extremes like this are totally normal and are just part of one’s ‘nature’? He had a hard time believing that. It seemed like way too much to just be a personal trait that others ought to put up with. Some things you can ask people to try to deal with, but then there are things that…aren’t very fair, so to say? For what reason would dealing with such over the top emotional lashes be worth it? That’s the question. ‘’Then maybe you should reconsider what is just nature, and what goes beyond that. Is it right of you to ask people to stay around you and deal with this stuff while you just kind of try to pass it off as not such a big deal? I don’t think many would find that very pleasant.’’ If it’s a problem, then it is one. And you probably ought to do something about it if it gets this bad so easily.

Outside of that…while he would let the blonde come closer…he was having none of the touchy feely things again. Regardless of the reason behind them. Even if we ignore the fact that this was probably a rather unsteady ground for making overly affectionate seeming moves as is, what the other was trying to do would hardly compute. Since when is forehead kissing an apology? Is that really necessary? That’s something he could see moms do to their kids as a way of being protective or similar kind of stuff. Not as a substitute for something you can just say or express in less…invasive ways. He really wasn’t fond of having other people’s faces way too close to his own like that unless there was a good reason for them to do that stuff. You know…start with something less forward before you go there…? Not everyone is eager to be smooched and whatnot as the first thing, and less so when you do it with an obscure meaning that the person likely doesn’t even get. That aside, he would simply turn his head to the side when the other got too close.


He didn’t need to feel mildly disturbed on top of all this as well. He had enough as is. ‘’How worse can this really get anyway….?’’ He didn’t think there was much that could make this go even lower. Unless it got to the point where he’d really snap due to having enough of the others’ self-negativism. It can really play on one’s patience when they are talking and someone only hears bad things all the time, regardless of what is being attempted. Sure, he had a few pessimistic views on things himself…but they were ones he was more or less content with. He wouldn’t go and break down over them just because they existed. So, he just plain sucked at some things…fine? While being perfect certainly sounds amazing, it’s just a wishful dream to begin with. He would likely attempt to oppose a person if they tried to put him down, but he sure wouldn’t weep over being wrong in the end. Not to that extent. Well, maybe if he was really depressed for some reason, but that would have to be a serious matter, and probably only a one-time thing in terms of a big breakdown.

Regardless, he wasn’t about to stay sitting around either. There was no point. He didn’t want to touch anything after all this, and he wasn’t fond of big crowds to begin with. Frankly, had he not gotten caught up with the blonde in the first place, he would probably have left a good while ago. This was not a setting he liked a lot, even if he may take a moment to stay there once in a blue moon.

He wouldn’t do anything outside of that though. While he could try to approach the other….was that really going to do anything? He wasn’t sure he was in the mood for extra shenaningans right now. Still, he didn’t really have a set destination to go to at the moment, and so would hang around nearby for now. Unless the blonde called him out first though, there was no saying whether he would make any moves….